You dream about her because you have not released her from your Life. You are hanging onto her as if she was a Lifeline, or as if she was going to save you. You are lost in this perpetual tug of war, and that solves nothing. She can't solve anything. It is all up to you. "When people show you who they really are, believe them." She sounds like a game player. She is the persecutor and you are the victim and you get torn around the drama triangle with the action changing from Victim to Rescuer to Perpetrator. It never ends. Growing up means letting go and releasing the negativity surrounding her. She has drawn you into it and keeps the merry-go-round running since you were 14, and you won't let her go. KARMA will come back to bite her when she least expects it. You won't see it, or even know about it! But people like her, who incite others, will eventually run into a strong, shrewd person who will put her in her place, and more! You have done all you can to make peace with her. Now it is time to leave her to God.
Read "The Games People Play" by Eric Berne...about the Drama Triangle, to learn about the shifting states of being in a tug of war with ppl like her. Stop being the Victim!