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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Entertainment & MusicJokes & Riddles · 1 year ago

What is the best way to fraudulently pose as a veteran in order to get people's respect and sympathies?

15 Answers

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  • 1 year ago

    Respect and sympathy; is that all you want? Shoot, I thought, at least, that you would want too make some $$ out of this.

    There are already people doing just this, as you read this.

    Just get a pair of fatigues, and stand on an off-ramp with a sign that just says "Screwed by Govt, Bureaucracy". Only false thing will be the fatigues, but, no law against it; and, as far as the sign goes, technically, you wouldn't be lying, as if you haven't been already, then, it will happen to you sometime in your life. You could pull in a nice sum.

    When I lived in a duplex that was next to an off-ramp; there was this guy that stood there about 3-4 times a week. I talked to him and he said that he makes an average of about $300 a day. I watched him quit one day and saw him cross the street, get into his Mercedes and drive off.

    Respect and sympathy does not pay the rent.

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  • 1 year ago

    Tell them you're Private Parts, and youre collecting for veteraneraeans. or something

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  • anand
    Lv 5
    1 year ago

    Steal a uniform, go to the busiest city center and shoot yourself on the head.

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  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    you could amputate both your legs, find an old uniform at good will... maybe some medals too, climb in a wheelchair and park at street corners and parks. a lot of people will discourage you from cutting off both legs but really it's the only way to make people really buy your story.

    there was this sssh0le who lived across the street from my brother. he used to do that, put stickers and flags on his wheelchair, wear a veteran's hat, etc. my brother clued me in one day that he actually lost his legs from diabetes. so.... cookies, ice cream, candy bars and cokes!! you could do it that way too. it'd be a lot slower but not near as painful as chopping them off yourself.

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  • Cee
    Lv 7
    1 year ago

    Don't do it. Only douchebags try that cr@p.

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  • 1 year ago

    Step 1: Post your intention on an international public forum.

    Then again...

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  • 1 year ago

    Buy a hat that says "veteran", get a tattoo of something like an army guy mud wrestling some kind of large mammal, (preferably a kangaroo or some kind of super sloth), make up some division (USMC 48TH REGIMENT COMMANDO INFANTRY DIVISION). In public ask for military discounts, insist you don't enjoy talking about your time in the service and then proceed to talk in vivid detail about your time in the service.

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  • 1 year ago

    Begging at rest stops in a tattered fatigues seems to work for a lot of people. It's a terrible thing to do though. Stolen valor is a serious thing among veterans and I can sympathize even though I haven't served in the military.

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  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    Ask a Hells Angel if you could give him a rim job

    • Cee
      Lv 7
      1 year agoReport

      +1... That is gold !

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  • 1 year ago

    Wear medals 🏅

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