Why does my mom not want me to make ends?
I have am autistic have depression and I self harm (I’m around 4-5 months clean) I am also homeschooled, my mom doesn’t let me have social media but a few months ago I secretly opened an Instagram account and made a friend name Stephanie, She was like the best friend ever. She is also autistic and self harms She’s the only reason I stopped cutting, we used to stay up until 2 am texting when we wanted to cut distracting ourselves and would FaceTime for hours venting/ranting about our days, it was nice to talk to someone we exchanged phone numbers after messaging and FaceTiming through insta for about 3 months and right after that my mom decides to go through my texts and finds out that I’m messaging another girl and freaks out yelling about how I’m hanging out with autistic whores and that I’m a f@gg0t and etc, then she tells me to delete the insta account because she doesn’t want old men following me (the account was private and only had celebrities, brands and a few long distance friends who I have FaceTimed with and now are not old kinky men as followers/following) so I delete it and now I’m all alone, with my deep dark thoughts about how I have no friends now at all and the fact that ya know I want to die but ya know sadly that’s not an “appropriate” thought. I’m alone and I have no one to to talk to, Stephanie is the only reason I didn’t commit suicide before, but now I have nothing to stop me, should I reach out to Stephanie again? What should I do about my crazy mother?
Friends not ends lol sorry
I am 15, my dad lives with us but all they do is fight. He’s nicer than my mom but you know he’s always on business trips. So he doesn’t see what a hell my life is
- Emily RoseLv 69 months ago
I feel like she's trying to protect you because sometimes people pick out friends that aren't really good at being a friend and i think she doesn't want that for you also she sounds worried for your safety and she probably did believe you were talking to a pedophile. As a mom i can honestly that's a very scary thing for parents something happening to their kids is their worst nightmare. But tell her how you feel about this in a calm voice because if you come off mad or aggressive about it she's just gonna get mad about how you're expressing it rather than listening to how you feel. Its not uncommon that parents and kids dont always understand each other but she does need to understand that you reaching out and connecting with people who are similar to you can be very good for you and very helpful. Try talking to her about it and see how that goes.
- 9 months ago
As another autistic person with self-harm problems, I would say definitely reach out, but also tell your mom that you need to for your mental health and safety. My mom and I don t get along at all, but she still tries to understand and do what is best for me. That s what moms do and yours probably will too. Having people you can connect with is a huge help for people like us. Talk to her and to your therapist.
- Anonymous9 months ago
Huh that’s weird! Typically people get better at socializing by socializing which is important with autism. I can understand homeschooling because schools aren’t good with autism. If you have a therapist maybe have her talk to your mother. Another idea is to join a club or sport or take a dance class and make friends there.
- MoretimeLv 79 months ago
Having a disability doesn't mean you're stupid and also doesn't necessarily mean you cannot ask for help. Clearly your mom appears to be over protective as well as being homophobic, because if you were to be Gay this sadly wasn't the way to treat your daughter if she was! However, sometimes the child has to be the one that appears to be the adult in situation such as this in order to breakdown some of their parents prejudices and fears around how you are conducting your life etc. I know there are possibly a lot of things/dilemma's that you're facing that you'd rather your mom not know but to offer her a crumb or two could bring you closer together and may in some way soften her a little into allowing you to use certain site as support. It's just my thoughts.
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- I careLv 79 months ago
First of all where is your dad in this situation? I would move in with him or your grandparents if possible.
Each of us need some social contact to grow in general …...sorry this is happening.
I hope you obtain a part time job even if GOODWILL, they hire people with some issues. Many have your type of issue and move on in life. I pray your issues keep getting better......stick to being better as life is precious.
- PearlLv 79 months ago
rnaybe you should rnove out and then you can talk to whoever you want
- 9 months ago
Tell your mom that you want to talk to her but that she has to listen to what you want to say. Tell her that you want your instagram back and that you want to continue to talk to your friend. If she doesn't let you do that try and reach out to your friend. Sometimes your parents aren't right and you need someone to look out for you.
- 9 months ago
Tell her how you feel about this in a calm way. Also understand she is trying to protect you because you are currently a very vulnerable person and I would assume young. Her reaction was too extreme and she didn’t think about you being lonely or needing someone to relate to, please find a way to bring this to her attention so she can help you.