Anonymous asked in HealthWomen's Health · 9 months ago

Would it affect your confidence if a man called u loose?

My bf jokingly or seriously (I couldn't tell), indirectly told me that I can go ahead with vagi*al tightening cream when I was shopping online and an ad popped up of that kind.

The next moment he apologized seeing me upset.

I've never had kids, not had more than 4partners in my entire life. But him saying indirectly, completely destroyed me. I've always felt pain every now and then the way he does it...

Why would someone ruin a woman's confidence like this?!?

I never talked him down ever when he came too soon. I didn't sleep all night as I felt horrible.. and we fought this morning and he says he was sorry but in a way that he doesn't care..

Do I just have to swallow my anger and move on with the insult? How would u deal with this when u don't deserve it??

8 Answers

  • 9 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    I would just talk to him honestly about how that coment made you feel and what it did to your confidence. I don’t think you making a big deal out of anything. Someone you care for insulted you, wether indirectly or not it still hurts. I hipe you can work to build you confidence back up so the next time someone says somthing nasty you can just brush it off :)

  • 9 months ago

    Something I haven't yet seen mentioned here in comments is that there highly likely is absolutely zero behind his comment towards you personally...other than if it can feel "even tighter" (why most men also desire abal sex), some men could think well why not try to make that happen, so again nothing AT ALL to do with you.

    That aside, men (generally) would get very bent you of shape of the situation were reversed. The two of you come across an ad for penile enhancement and you say what he said to you, "yeah you should go ahead and get that". My guess is he would be defensive and pissed right off at you from how you have described his reactions to you.

    Regardless it was a very insentive and unnecessary comment. I would try explaining the reverse scenario to him BUT if you don't see this person in your future and do not feel you can get beyond this/his attitude towards you, you may want to think about your options and if he's worth the hassle...if he is to you, communication is key.

    • Kendall
      Lv 4
      8 months agoReport

      Very good. I'm a man, and I agree it's his problem. Communication, education. As a man, I feel no difference in "tightness" between women's vaginas (no, I don't prefer anal sex, either). Maybe he has a smaller erection, a smaller penis.

  • 9 months ago

    Your feels are valid.

    No one deserves to be treated with so little respect. I'd walk out on my partner if he ever said something so demoralising and disgusting. He does not respect you and obviously can't empathize.

    Get rid of him girl. There are much better men out there. You do not have to settle for someone who talks to you like that when there are plenty of guys who would treat you like a princess

  • 9 months ago

    This isn't a real problem for women, in my experience. I'm a man in my late 50's, and have Not noticed a lot of difference in the tightness of women's vaginas during full penetration. Some of my girlfriends had kids, so the question of tightness after childbirth is there. I don't notice a lot of difference when my erection is fully hard inside her. My penis is only slightly larger than average when erect, so I don't think that's why. If a man has an issue with how tight your vagina could be, maybe his erection is shorter or thinner than average. I always wondered about that- what are they talking about? I'm sure your vagina is very normal, stretching just enough during sexual penetration. Never let some comment like that hurt your self confidence as a woman. He doesn't understand women's bodies very well, and possibly not his own, either. If you're still concerned, try doing Kegel exercises daily. That's the reason many women do this, and your boyfriend can, too. I do Kegel exercises, too. Men can tighten and release the muscles at the base of the penis while flaccid (or erect), as an exercise. He may notice improvements sexually in his own body.

    • Kendall
      Lv 4
      9 months agoReport

      ..I tried emailing you. Hope you are feeling better about yourself. You should! me anytime, ok?

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  • 9 months ago

    it also may indicate that he is small

  • 9 months ago

    Remind him the others have hit both sides at the same time. His hide behind the humor shield if his feelings are hurt. Honestly "LOOSE" can also mean flirty and readily available and not just the sizes of the equipment. Finally if you care about him and don't want to return the slight, lie. Tell him you've never been so wet before. Whatever serves you best. Personally, I think you're overthinking it

  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    This means he doesn't respect you. You should move on

  • 9 months ago

    You are making WAY too much of this. It 'destroyed you'? Wow! You must have had an easy life if one comment can throw you for a loop. And he even apologized. I say... GROW UP!

    • canadacraig
      Lv 7
      9 months agoReport

      No Ashley - I'm known for being someone people can confide in and share their deepest secrets with. As hundreds of people already have. WHY? Because they know two things about me. 1 - I never betray a trust. And 2 - I am always honest with them.

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