Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 9 months ago

My boyfriend doesn't like any of my friends or my family...How do I handle this?

My boyfriend and I have been together for more than 5 years and he hasn't really even met my friends, only two of them. Although I don't have a lot of friends the friends I have are important to me. My boyfriend believes all my friends are 'fake' and aren't really my friends because all we do is 'talk about our problems'. Any friendship I have he think is stupid and bad for me, and it's gotten to the point where I no longer have certain friends in my life because he gets so upset when he hears I am with them for an evening having dinner, nothing crazy.

Meanwhile my boyfriend doesn't have any friends or one person he close to (he used to have one friend but he got tired of him and dropped their 15 year friendship.) He claims 'he doesn't need friends' and he focuses on his 'inner self' more. Even though I know he is such a jerk sometimes and makes me feel guilty for having these friendships, I disgustingly chose him every time. What can I do?

7 Answers

  • 9 months ago
    Best Answer

    This sounds like a red flag to me. If he doesn't like your friends he doesn't have to hang out with them, but the fact that he doesn't like not even one person in your life (friend or relative) seems quite weird to me.

    This sounds like any abusive partner, first they isolate their victim, making them lose contact with friends or family, and apparently he's succeeding because you "choose him" every time.

    If he doesn't like your friends, that's ok but he doesn't need to guilt trip you for having friends or other people in your life. A supportive partner would say "yeah i don't like your friends but i hope you have fun" that's it.

    He criticising your friends for being fake (btw, this is quite stupid, good friends talk about their problems) is also another red flag. He doesn't seem to respect you as an adult capable to make decisions about whom she hangs out with.

    Personally I would dump this guy. Too much drama, too many red flags. This has been going on for 5 years, this won't change and it won't get better.

    Out there there are thousands of men that aren't insecure and don't want to isolate you from your loved ones.

    Up to you.

  • you could either listen to him and take it on board or discount what he thinks and find another boyfriend.

  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    he sounds depressed, honestly...

  • Teal
    Lv 7
    9 months ago

    You have been with him for five years. This is who he is and he isn't going to change. He wants to isolate you from people who care about you and who are a threat to his control over you. Your choices are to give up your life and obey his whims, or break up and reconnect with the people who actually care about your wellbeing and happiness. You aren't helpless. You don't have to choose him. This can end today if you want it to.

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  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    He is controlling, you need to consider dumping him. A life of hell awaits you.

  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    Trade up and find a new boyfriend.

  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    Get a new boyfriend

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