Ambition is a wonderful thing, and is in fact to be recommended. However, its also more than possible to become quite over confident , and get quite carried away with self confidence and enthusiasm, and eventually realise than you have become just a little bit carried away. Such eventual realisation takes quite a bit of living with, but if you think about it, its a very necessary step in coming to terms with your abbility.
To kill yourself is taking your self-hurt just a little too far, and rather pointless.
Why not re-assess your abilities, realise what in practice you can and cannot really do, and take up something practcal like window cleaning or garden maintenance ?