Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 2 years ago

Why does the non-custodial parent have to be so difficult?

I’m in Washington state and I’m the primary parent to our 5 year old . I want to move out of state with her , but her father won’t let me .

I want to travel with her , take her on a 3 month vacation at least . He won’t even let me do that.

I know I’ll have to go to court and prove why the move is best interest. This is shitty . So I guess I have to get an order that allows me to vacation?

8 Answers

  • Anonymous
    2 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Joint custody means both parents have to be in agreement for what is best for the child and sad but you probably have to get a lawyer to settle this.

  • .
    Lv 7
    2 years ago

    Could be because non-custodial doesn't want to have even LESS time with the child than they have because they aren't the custodial parent. That would just make sense. You failed to provide any info on whether or not the other parent typically has an interest in being with the child, and if they have a close relationship, so that would affect my answer a little bit.

    Generally speaking though, what parent would want their child to move out of state where they couldn't see them as much? Even if it's in the best interests of the child, it's odd (if your story is true) that you seem so puzzled by the other parent's reaction.

  • Anonymous
    2 years ago

    Wow, you really are selfish. Grow up!

  • Anonymous
    2 years ago

    As you can see by these answers, you're not coming across well here. Obviously, there's always more to the story than people can put in a question, but surely you see that a parent who is trying to get her ex out of her her child's life will come across poorly? It would be different if he was violent, or on drugs, but you didn't say that.

    You sound like someone who needs a reminder that you aren't the victim here. Your daughter is. A 5 year old doesn't care about a 3 month vacation. She wants mommy and daddy together in a happy family. You didn't give her that, so next best is working closely with dad to co-parent well. Instead you want to move hundreds of miles away?

    I wouldn't waste a whole lot of money taking this to court The vacation argument is silly, and very few courts are going to let one parent move so far away. Maybe you need another reminder that fathers have equal rights to their kids.

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  • 2 years ago

    It's not the best, actually.

    What is best for the child is actually having regular, consistent access and interactions with both parents. Moving out of state will definitely prevent that from happening. Traveling for 3 months at a time will definitely prevent that from happening.

    It seems like you think that "primary parent" means you get to lug your child around wherever you want whenever you want without regard to what is actually in her best interest. Grow up.

    I actually support her father in this case. He has rights to see and spend time with his child. No 5 year old needs to be going on a 3 month vacation anyways. It is painfully obvious you are trying to make things harder for HIM purely because you are the "primary parent".

    No 5 year old will enjoy a 3 month long trip, either. Don't lie to yourself. Sure, her father may have taken her on vacations, but I can guarantee you it was not for 3 whole months. MAYBE a week at most. Do not try to act like those are the same thing.

  • 2 years ago

    Because any decent parent would want their child to be around them. It’s one thing to be in a different house a couple miles away, but out of state is something completely different. And a 3 month vacation away?

    Unless he’s an unfit parent, he’s more than likely not trying to spite you.

  • 2 years ago

    You need to get legal permission to take off with your shared child for an undesignated length of time. It's very rare that a "vacation" with a 5 year old is at least 3 months long. You have primary custody but clearly her Dad is involved in her life and intends to remain so.

    The desire to pack up and move far away with a child is really common. I know at least 4 fathers who have fought for their parental rights and blocked their children from being moved across the country with the child's mother thinking that if they flew out to visit their kid a couple or so times a year.. that'd be plenty. But keep that $3,500 monthly check coming. Relegating the father into the position of nothing more than a wallet. There are an increasing number of states getting on board now with the Father's Rights movement.

  • 2 years ago

    Why would a non-custodial parent have a problem with you moving away or taking the child on a three month vacation with you? Perhaps because that means you ARE going to be making it more difficult for them to have any visitation by doing that. You may be the custodial parent but you are NOT the only parent, you chose to make a baby with them, so you gave them some rights to the child too. As long as the other parent is truly making an effort to stay in touch with the child I think that it should be encouraged, not discouraged.

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