Your spending habits reek of irresponsible spending and for that reason, there is no way on earth any lender is going to take a $50,000.00 risk to lend you any money.
Besides which, consolidating a debt with someone you are not yet married to is a HUGE mistake. It is. Really, it is.
Your problem is not the credit cards. Your problem is that you keep using them. Stop. When lenders see how much you owe and that you are carrying high balances or close to your limit balances, you will not receive their financial support because it shows you are living on credit, not what you earn.
Just go on a spending freeze. If you do not NEED it, stop buying it. Stay out of stores unless you need food and that's it. Anyone who has incurred the debt you have is charging things that they cannot afford. That is painfully obvious.
You work on your own debt and let him work on his. Joining debt is a really stupid idea and quite frankly, it probably cannot even happen because I do not believe consolidation companies will combine the debt of two people who independently racked up their credit cards.
Going into a marriage with this much debt is not so smart. Add the wedding expenses and you are going to be up to $75K in debt. Elope, please elope.
Eat and drink at home. Stop shopping. The way to get out of debt is to be HONEST about it. Tell your friends that you are not spending any money so you can pay off your debts so they understand why you cannot meet them for a night out for dinner and entertainment. Do not go on vacation or take trips anywhere other than local attractions. Stop using your credit cards, just stop.
You know how your bills add up and you count them again to be sure that outrageous amount is really the amount you have to pay? Well, believe it or not, when you save money, it also adds up just the same. So, stop spending and start making your goal to save to pay off your cards.
Only buy what you NEED. Unless the two of you are on board with this, you will forever be in debt and guess what, you will not be able to get a house of your own. You are probably paying off the credit card for things you charged over a year ago. It just is not worth it.
If you want, consolidate JUST your own cards with the highest interest. But, that ONLY works if you stop charging and start living within your means. In other words, if you do not have the cash in your pocket, you cannot afford to buy or charge it. That money in your pocket belongs to the credit card companies until they are paid.