Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 3 years ago

Military Spouse Career Conflict?

Hello, my wife is in bootcamp about to graduate in less than 2 weeks. I graduated college in December in Game Art and Design, I'm 23 female and my wife is 25 and we have been together for 3 1/2 years married since march and im about to start my dream job in a week. i live in NYC. Before we got married and before she enlisted she said the military will give me money to live wherever i decide to get a job at and that i didn't need to stay wherever shes stationed and she will support me from afar and we can visit eachother, after she enlisted My wife said she wants me to quit my job when she comes back so we can move into a house together wherever she is stationed. I told her 3D jobs are very hard to get and i spent my entire life learning different art I've been working so hard to get to where i am. She said that im an unsupportive wife and any wife would give up their dreams for their spouse thats in the military and that i shouldn't put my personal goals before her, and that i dont love her because location shouldnt determine happiness and that im a terrible person and a ***** And has threatened divorce/taking away my health insurance since im her dependent.

I've been trying to find remote jobs but it just isnt really a thing in the 3D art. If there are remote jobs for 3D its rare

I dont really know what to do? I found my dream job finally, i dont really wanna give that up, its apart of me.

I know alot of military marriages are long distance because of spouse careers(?)

16 Answers

  • Steve
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    Don’t give up your dream job. Give up your selfish spouse. She is going to wreck your life.

  • 3 years ago


    Military + Spouse + Careers = conflict.-

    absolutely. 100% of the time.

  • 3 years ago

    You need to watch the following videos and listen closely:

    Youtube thumbnail


    Youtube thumbnail

  • 3 years ago

    Well since you are NOT LEGALLY Married in the Army I hope she helps you.. Its tough enough to be in the military but . If you want to take the dream job leave her and if not be supportive.. Its that easy...You can get health insurance anywhere, not sure if the military will give it to you.. But find your dream yourself because if you don't do it you will regret it and you will fight all the time.. Be happy doing what you love not what she wants... If you 2 ment to be it will be later

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  • 3 years ago

    Sounds like your spouse is a LIAR. They clearly only told you what you wanted to hear until push came to shove and then went back on what they said. The real question is "Don't you deserve more than being married to a liar?" As for divorce, it sucks, but it is also a "life changing" event so you can then sign up for health insurance without a penalty. So my vote is dump your spouse, because clearly they are just a self centered liar.

  • 3 years ago

    Sounds like you could benefit from marriage counseling. The military can probably help you arrange it.

    If she's making serious threats then I might also start talking to a lawyer.

  • 3 years ago

    What is your question?

  • 3 years ago

    Sounds more like a personality conflict not Military Spouse Career Conflict

    as you stated, many military families are far flung apart

    She wants things her way and thats all thats about it

    she promised you how things were going to be and has done a complete turnaround from that.

    She has to at least try your way

    You have worked too long and too hard to walk away before its began for a person who wont compromise for you.

    If you gave up this job, you have no guarantee of happiness

    you have to at least try this job, that has been a dream for so long before deciding, if it comes down to it, her or your career?

  • Teva
    Lv 5
    3 years ago

    Sounds like the army's turned her into a psycho *****, no surprise there. If i were you i'd go with the job thing.....and hope she doesn't hunt you down 😬

  • 3 years ago

    divorce her

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