You are obviously a naive little girl or boy who doesn’t even have a damn clue what’s going on.For all you know they are having sex A SINGLE GUY RUBBING HER JEANS.They seem real comfortable together if I where you I would do the RIGHT thing and tell the husband immediately.Cheating is happening not in front of you but behind closed doors!
Not only is not not OK, but it's really kind of creepy. I mean, is the wife 12 years old? What's with the rubbing of privates throught the blue jeans? That's something that might appeal to a virgin. Anyone experienced with sex would ditch the blue jeans and the panties, quick. Or, her partner would not be interested in rubbing blue jeans...
"If a married woman had lunch with a single guy in her car is that cheating?" - No, eating a meal isn't cheating.
"what if guy rub her privates through her blue jeans? but that's all? She didn't kiss him or anything, it was 5 minutes of rubbing..is this ok?" - No, in almost all cases, that would not be okay. No sexual contact of ANY kind unless the married/dating couple has an agreement that they are allowed to "play" with others.
"I don't think it was cheating because he never touched her insides, it was no skin on skin." - Somehow I doubt you'd feel that way if it was YOUR spouse getting sexually rubbed outside their clothing by someone other than you.
The word "cheating" is not clearly defined.
In old Jewish law, it was sufficient for a woman to spend enough time, with a man, that you could have cooked an egg. Period. It did not matter what they did.
That's because in Jewish law (as in fake-Christian American society) appearances are everything. God (the fake American God) does not care what you did. God only cares about what others think you did.