How to get over attraction and desire for someone other than your husband?

First off I’m not proud of this, but it’s just the way it is for me... I’ve been married to my husband 8 years, we’re both 34 and Christian Iraqi. I care so deeply for him, and he has always been the most amazing friend a person can have. But lately I’ve been asking myself if I’m really in love with him, due to... show more First off I’m not proud of this, but it’s just the way it is for me... I’ve been married to my husband 8 years, we’re both 34 and Christian Iraqi. I care so deeply for him, and he has always been the most amazing friend a person can have. But lately I’ve been asking myself if I’m really in love with him, due to something going on for a while that I try to ignore, but it’s eating me inside these days. So way before we were married I had a relationship with a guy I knew from my family’s old neighborhood in Detroit when they first came from Iraq. He was black and fit with an attitude. He’s the type I’m most attracted to, but I couldn’t stay with him after my family found out and flipped! They are strict in culture and don’t allow blacks to marry us. Me and him were on and off for almost two years, and let me tell you it was the most mind blowing, amazing, painful (temporarily) and pleasurable sex I ever had, and he was huge. I miss that. I dont get excited with my husband anymore, the attraction is gone. It’s just hard to be with him when I’m not satisfied and want something else. We barely have sex because of me, it takes a toll on him too. I still love him but I want to venture out and find my old flame, or a black man with the same features and date him. I can’t get these fantasies out of my head and I cant stop wanting to live them. I can’t go on like this! Why me? How can I live a normal happily married life with my husband? Please has anyone gone through something similar?
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