Do you think that parents that don’t teach their child their native language are selfish?

So my parents are immigrants from Somalia and didn’t teach me Somali. I was born and raised in Canada. My mom told me she spoke it to me as a young kid but then I started mixing Somali and English together so she stopped and just spoke to me in English. At home we just speak in English now. I understand the... show more So my parents are immigrants from Somalia and didn’t teach me Somali. I was born and raised in Canada. My mom told me she spoke it to me as a young kid but then I started mixing Somali and English together so she stopped and just spoke to me in English. At home we just speak in English now.

I understand the language alright (probably because of that early exposure) but my speaking skills are terrible. I feel robbed of my heritage. I don’t like not being able to communicate with my own grandparents. I told my mom about how I felt and she just brushed me off and told me to stop whining. I asked my dad if they could teach me now (I’m 20) and he said ok but just switched back to English right away once I started to struggle. I can’t learn it on my own without my parents—there’s no resources since it’s not a well known language.

It’s come to the point that I don’t even identify as Somali anymore. I work in a store and if a Somali person comes up to me I say I’m another ethnicity so that they don’t try to speak to me in Somali, find out I don’t speak it well and then make some patronizing comment like “wow you don’t even speak your own language, why didn’t your parents teach you”.

I’ve spoken to other people in this situation and all of them feel resentment towards their parents. Imo it’s very selfish to rob your child of their own heritage. What do you think?
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