My husband and I aren’t allowed to sleep together?

So this is actually a very strange question so be prepared lol.

Long story short my husband and I got married about 9 months ago.

We are both 22. Him and I are in South Carolina visiting his aunt and uncle because we made a pit stop to see them on our drive back from florida. Well anyways they like me very much and truly consider me part of the family...however its our first night here and they are forcing us to sleep in separate rooms!!

I went up to go to the bathroom and his aunt poked her head around the corner and said “just trying to make sure you’re not sneaking into Derrick’s room hahaha” along with a “i know what you might be up to/caught ya look”.

Can someone please explain to me why the HECK they are forbidding us from sleeping together? It’s not even like they are uncomfortable with affection because they constantly hug and lightly kiss eachother all the time!

They are not even religious or anything like that so its not like that has something to do with anything. But i mean we are HUSBAND AND WIFE. MARRIED. They are treating us like 2 horn y 15 year olds that just met.

We also don’t want to be rude considering we are their guests and they are great and surprisingly very normal people.

This is just very weird. What do we do?! We are technically here for the next two weeks!

Also, YES they know we’re married. They attended the wedding lol.

Thanks in advance

33 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    3 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    On the one hand... you should Inform them you'll be sleeping together as you're both complete adults, and married. Let them know nicely it's kind of demeaning to treat you like little teenagers. Let them know if they're concerned about cleanliness, you have no issue changing the sheets and washing them for them, or whatever.

    If they object- then Let them know if they have an issue with this, then you can pack up and leave because you won't stay somewhere where you're patronized and disrespected, no matter how innocently they try to play it off

    Make sure you talk to your husband first and show him my answer, so that you're both on the same page and in agreement

    Source(s): On the other hand... Chances are, they know full well it's unfair of them to ask this. lol They probably secretly don't wanna see you the full 2 weeks, and they probably were like "ugh, inlaws.." they might be hoping that by ithem dictating where you sleep, that it'll cause you to wanna leave early on your own decision. They probably eitjer don't wanna see you much at all and are just being polite, or they don't wanna be woken up by sexy love making. It IS their house, their rules
  • 3 years ago

    cause theyre being weird about it, i would go stay somewhere else , i wouldnt put up with that

  • 3 years ago

    Here are your choices: sleep there for free, get a hotel room while you're in their town, or leave early. I suppose you could also try talking to BOTH of them about it, but I don't know that you'll get any result. Or you could say to them, we can sleep together or we can leave in the morning. Which do you prefer?

  • GEEGEE
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    I'd be inclined to stay elsewhere if possible. You've been married almost a year so it's not like you just met and married in a very brief time. If you do stay somewhere else, and if they ask why, you can shuffle the situation around and say you want to protect THEIR privacy.

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  • GB
    Lv 5
    3 years ago

    Does your Aunt have children? If no, then ask if it is because she is a virgin. If I was you, and even if they agreed that separate rooms are wrong, I'd be worried about them sitting by the door at night. I think it's best to find a hotel. Also, warn the rest of your family about them.

    In your position, I would not tell them if I became a parent. If they found out, and moaned about this, I would say, "You think it's wrong for us to have sex, so I know how DISGUSTED you are that we have proved we did. We don't want our children to meet anyone who thinks they should not have been brought into existence."

  • 3 years ago

    I visit my in laws all the time and never have they ever made such a suggestion. However we also respected the fact that we were in their home and NEVER done anything but sleep and or cuddle. So I am not sure what they think you will or may do... but bring that up to them and let them know you respect them, and that you are not planning on disrespecting their home by doing the naughty in their extra bedroom.... lol.

  • Kelly
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    This is the risk you take when staying as a guest in someone's home. Either suck it up and be pleasant about it, or go elsewhere. I'm sure there's hotel rooms available.

    Back when I met my husband's family for the first time, he took me to Houston (we live outside of Detroit) but we went on a weekend trip to meet some of his other family in Dallas and his brother and his wife where there too. It was his grandparents house and I bunked with my husband's sister-in-law in a room and in a separate room was my husband and his brother. We weren't married yet, but they were (with kids too). But that's how his grandma wanted it, so that's what we went with. The next trip it was a similar set up only this time we brought my kids (from my first marriage) and this time I bunked with them and my husband (boyfriend then) bunked alone.

  • 3 years ago

    Get a hotel room if they're uncomfortable with you two sleeping together.

  • rac
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    I don't know what they are thinking. I would stand my ground and tell them, "look, we are married and we will share the same bed. If that is somehow unacceptable to you, then we will leave." I hope that gets the point across. Best wishes.

    Source(s): my married opinion
  • 3 years ago

    Ask her whether she slept in the same room as her husband when they were young - if she married, of course. Tell her that your parents and his slept together, otherwise you would not have been conceived?! Ask questions rather than tell, though, I suggest.

  • 3 years ago

    Maybe they just don't want to "hear" it? Although in that case most folks would say let us know if we disturb you, he walls here are so thin, and let you draw the conclusion they will be able to hear you.

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