Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 3 years ago

20 year old virgin? Not interested in sex:/?

I know most of you probably think I'm crazy...and I'm beginning to wonder if I am too. I am a sophomore in college and am surrounded by people who have slept with like 30-40 people. My best friend met one of her bf's in a threesome (they didn't last long to say the least). Everyone is experimental but I have absolutely no desire to be (whatsoever!)

I was a "late bloomer" but we're talking about that shouldn't change matters. I had my first kiss at 18 and have never actually had a bf. I've had crushes and made out with a few guys, but the problem is, I felt absolutely nothing. And I really thought I was crushing hard on one of them. Then, the second time I see him, I didn't feel anything when he kissed me or when he kissed my neck (which I guess is suppose to be a major turn on). He was very proper and there wasn't really any wandering hands, because he knows how I am. But, now I'm just not interested in him. Maybe because I was hoping for sparks or for a romantic, gentlemanly guy. I'm hoping it is some sort of reason like that...not me.

But, I really dont know. I find "down there" kinda gross. I have a hard time with tampons. And I don't find myself the least bit aroused thinking about being with a guy in any way. It's weird because I guess I dont want to go past kissing, but I haven't even found that to be particularly pleasurable. I really don't understand it, and I dont think it's normal:/ It really bothers me because I just feel even more awkward and weird about it though I am good at faking my discomfort. Most of my friends have no idea just how innocent I really am. I mean naturally they know I dont make the same choices. Sure random hookups and drugs aren't my thing, but little do they realize that nothing seems to really be.

I'm so confused. I can't really go to a doctor bout this. FIrst off it hellllllla awk. And secondly, because my parents are helping fund me through college and this isn't exactly the ideal conversation to have with mom and dad. Dont judge me:P


3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    3 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    maybe you should try kissing a girl ..after all katy perry did and she liked it ;)

    also don't worry about it too much your still young ,the right person will come along and you will feel comfortable and sexually turned on ..sometimes it takes different reasons to turn us on maybe an intelligent guy or girl it doesn't always have to be physical things . also seems maybe your having a gender problem ? I mean your a 20yr old girl and find your vagina gross? defiantly look into some information around gender maybe your not comfortable in your skin ?

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  • 3 years ago

    I'm a 19-year-old virgin - you're not alone! I have done other sexual things with guys, but never sex. Virginity is special to me, and I only want to lose it to someone who understands that. I also have a hard time with tampons, but I have a fear of putting things into my vagina (lame, I know). Constant one-night-stands would probably do some psychological damage also. Try to get to know yourself better and what makes you feel good. Masturbation will help you feel more comfortable with what you like if you haven't tried that already.

    Good luck! Hope I helped. Can you help me with mine?

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  • Anonymous
    3 years ago

    you are perfectly fine. there are many men out there just dying to marry a virgin just like you and would consider you their dream come true. you will make the perfect wife for a man who insists on only marrying a virgin girl.

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