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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 4 years ago

Online friend stresses me out?

I love her a lot and we've been best friends for almost five years, since we were kids, but the last year or so has been a whole lot of misunderstandings/fights. Mentioning here, at least 70 percent of the time I'm sacrificing [days] to talk to her well into the morning because of timezone differences. We can talk from 10 pm-6 am and after sleeping all morning and afternoon, I wake up about 4 pm, exhausted but just trying to exist outside of my bed. Then it starts again that night. Years of doing this gets old real fast.

So yesterday I wake up with enough time to eat, clean, and just barely start up a new game. We talked awkwardly for a little bit (wasn't in the mood to keep up appearances for her) and I continue my game after I hit her with a brb. Three hours later, I realize I hadn't said anything, which, yeah, that's my bad. So I send her something, apologize, and she blows up on me. I tell her sorry again and again but it doesn't sway her, and eventually, in disbelief at the dramatic garbage that's going on, I tell her I'll catch her later until things cool down. She tells me fine, not to expect her to patch things up this time, and leaves. On one hand, I somewhat understand the frustration, but on the other, as someone who can go weeks without talking to someone and be fine with them, 3 hours so aggravating.

Am I a bad friend? Is it wrong to tell her how crazy this stuff/the pressure feels at this point? I just don't know what to do anymore B(

Update:

In the past, I used to forget a lot and do the same thing, and after her telling me to work on it before I've been trying a long time to always be there. Thank you though. You're right. We only message each other and rarely call, but this has made me realize how ridiculous it is having be there 24/7, let alone through text. I've been the one to just up and leave too though, so this fight's on me to fix I guess. I just hope telling her how I feel doesn't destroy our friendship.

2 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    4 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Why would you be a bad friend? You're human. You won't be perfect, EVER. It was a mistake. You have a life of your own with your own responsibilities. Sometimes things just slip your mind. Instead of being understanding and just brushing it off, she acted like you did this with her all the time. So, she was out of line and extremely dramatic. She chose to hold a grudge about it instead of just accepting your apology.

    I think what you should have told her what you told us because she doesn't quite understand the links you have to go through just to talk to her and entertain and fulfill her needs. She NEEDS to know that the timezones have always been a hassle for you, and you should have stated that earlier. Why hasn't she ever sacrificed time for you? Also, if the time zones are different, you don't always have to talk LIVE. just leave each other a message and reply when you can.

    I think you need to stay silent and leave this alone. She's the one that left and she should be the one to come back if she values your friendship. But girl, use a backbone and clap back. Don't let somebody's self-absorbed fussy attitude manipulate you.

  • 4 years ago

    don't talk to your friend anymore

    answer my question?

    https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20170...

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