Marriage issue - please advise?

Update: My husband & I have been married for 20 yrs & we have had our ups & downs, but this yr everything has come to its peak. My husband I have expressed we still love each other, but my husband states that he needs to find himself. Is there any suggestions to aid us on how to help him with trying to find... show more My husband & I have been married for 20 yrs & we have had our ups & downs, but this yr everything has come to its peak. My husband I have expressed we still love each other, but my husband states that he needs to find himself. Is there any suggestions to aid us on how to help him with trying to find himself?
We have children with the 19, 16, & 11; anyone who has children know that they can addstress on a marriage. I know once we are past this stage & are left with us, we can make it.
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