i am 23 and a muslim who needs advice from muslim?

I am a muslim from lebanon but born and raised in US and regretted for losing my virginity to my bf, we had pre marital sex several times but i always told him to stop once he got to close to ripping my hymen. Unfortunately it slipped and i lost my virginity. I have repented to god but still regret losing my virginity, my parents trusted me and i betrayed their trust... Is there any option were i can repair my mistakes?

ive spoke to my bf concerning my regret and he said that i worry too much, on the top of that he asked me to do it again with him but i refused. i am afraid that he will leave even after we did it...

my parentd told me that i am not how i used to be because i dont clean myself or even look after myself like before. my mother sometimes have to force me to eat, bathe, brush my hair etc. i might have exaggerated concerning losing my virginity before marriage but i truly regret it and dont know what to think... any advice from muslims on how to change myself?

my bf will engage me soon between sept and oct, he spoke to my parents and his parents and they are happy, the only problem i have is him asking for sex, he knows that i regret it but he still asks for it and distresses me more nd im afraid that he woll leave if i dont give it to him... i dont know how to deal with him, any suggestion regarding my bf and how to deal with him?

Update:

i appreciate advises from anyone

12 Answers

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  • 3 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Salam Your broke hymen could not be repaired.Regret will emerge after you did certain bad deed so it will be useless.Dating just like in western countries in Islam is forbidden.You must get married so with your bf who have stolen your virginity.

    • sara3 years agoReport

      we will get engage soon. right now, he's asking for sex which distresses me more...

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  • Dr. D
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    Tell him "no". If he is a good man he will want to protect you and respect you. Tell him you love him, but sex will have to wait until the wedding night, and if he is a good man then he will respect you.

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  • 3 years ago

    This is harraam! In are quran Allah commands us to stone such a women you are not even married.? Allah says you shall be married before having sex.. our prophet would have killed you two scum you bring shame to our islam i spit on the likes of you my judegment would be beheading!! You and the boy disgraced us

    Praise be to Allah

    الجواب: الحمد لله

    • ...Show all comments
    • Allah is merciful. But ur broke his law and you shall be be stoned for your crimes
      Damascus, Syria
      الجواب: الحمد لله

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  • Anonymous
    3 years ago

    You asked this before, please don't spam questions, I'm not sure what else needs to be said. As I said last time...

    Salam, feel free to post all Islamic questions in the Ramadan section where Muslims are like this: society and culture > holidays > Ramadan. (edit it there and block trolls).

    1. Don't email abdulmalik, he exposes conversations and pics and blackmails people.

    2. Yep you did a sin that is mentioned in the same sentence as murder and shirk (verses 25:68-69), and the punishment in the hereafter for that is double punishment..unless you repent.

    3. Which leads me to my next point, repent for this crime sincerely (and if you want to marry him he also has to repent), pray 2 rakats taubah (recommended), make dua to Allah ta'ala to keep you away from that sin, make intention to not do that sin again. One who repents for a sin is like one who didn't commit a sin. Also you cannot ever reveal your sin to anyone, Allah ta'ala will forgive you so long as you cover up your sins and the sins of others.

    4. The Prophet (s) said marry based on faith, if he is not a good Muslim I don't recommend marriage although both of you equally are not good Muslims in my opinion which both of you should work on by increasing your Iman, Allah ta'ala wants you to come into the Iman and there are dozens of ways to increase faith (reading Quran, going to the masjid, surrounding yourself with positive influences among Muslims, lowering your gaze, reciting lah illaha illah lah as dhikr, etc. Avoid sin, sin weakens faith until you lose it in some cases.

    5. If you aren't wearing hijab you need to start, if you aren't praying you NEED to start. You've committed a huge sin, now spend the rest of your life in service to Allah ta'ala living the way HE wants you to live not the way YOU want to live. Don't EVER sit with a non-mahrim alone ever again as you cannot handle it (nor he). COME NOT NEAR ZINA that is what Allah ta'ala says in the Quran. You lost so much reward because of this (for your hereafter) Subhanallah, so much reward!! no more! It's okay though Inshallah, repent and do your best to do good deeds to make up for this. I'm not trying to make it personal, I'm lebanese myself (irrelevant idk why you mentioned it but just to let you know, this isn't personal). it just angers me whenever shaytan gets the best of one of our own, those who have weak faith among us and do nothing whatsoever to increase it and abstain to realize that this world is an illusion and that the hereafter is the goal and that you WILL face Allah ta'ala, it's just mind boggling how this escapes peoples minds sometimes to the point where they commit sins like the one you commit. May Allah ta'ala protect us all from that sin and forgive you and him, and if he isn't Muslim then you cannot marry him (based on your description I take it he is). And none of you are Muslim if you aren't worshiping Allah ta'ala as he prescribed in the Noble Quran. You must pray 5 times a day or you have nothing whatsoever to do with Islam.

    ----------------

    If he doesn't pray then he's not Muslim and you cannot marry him. Tell him that it is a condition if he wants to marry you, seems like you're marrying someone of lower level than you, women should seek out men who have the strongest faith not men who have weak faith. I don't like it, the MAN is supposed to guide his delicate wife, he is the head of the house, how's he gonna guide if he is lower than you in deen? It's not good to me. He should improve and you should make it obligatory upon him. @asmaa just ignore him (abdulmalik), don't backbite his mom, all unislamic, reacting negatively isn't going to help.

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  • "Is there any option were i can repair my mistakes?" - Yes whore, there is. I gave you advise on it last time. But you dont want to be pure, it is sad that you are so desperate. You said "my bf will engage me soon between sept and oct" - I cannot believe you are going to marry your pimp! How sad.

    Email me, whore. We will discuss.

  • 3 years ago

    If your boyfriend will leave you because you won't have sex with him then it means he doesn't love you.

    And don't worry. You can say that you broke your hymen because you used a tampon.

    • sara3 years agoReport

      its not easy as it seems

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  • Keith
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    He is black mailing you, and you are both living a lie.

    He get milk for free, and he may not buy the cow now.

    • sara3 years agoReport

      never speak like that about him ever again

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  • Anonymous
    3 years ago

    If your god is truly just, he won't care about what you do with your vagina.

    • sara3 years agoReport

      i have repented to go. i am ashamed of my parents who trusted me

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  • Anonymous
    3 years ago

    how do you get close enough to the guys there, with their awful, sour, unbathed body stench?

    • sara3 years agoReport

      my bf is hygienic

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  • 3 years ago

    Get married soon.

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