MY BOYFRIEND'S MOM DOESN'T LIKE ME?
So I just found out that my boyfriend of 11 months who has never introduced me to his family, had an interesting conversation with his mom through texts on his phone. He's 23. and im 20.
I never met his mom formally, but I saw her once way back 2 years ago when my boyfriend and I were just friends and we we're together with our friends. She just said HI to all of us and left. So thats it.
Her text to my bf: You guys always fetch and drive home your girlfriend who are worthless!! I'm working for my children and not for those with no blood relation to me.
This is the only time I'm asking you a favor. But when it comes to your girl you will do everything! I didn't buy you car just to fetch and drive a worthless girl!
-She commanded my boyfriend to fetch his younger brother from school and he did not want to. But it wasn't because of me and it's because my boyfriend thinks his younger brother is old enough he's 19 y.o. and they have a spare car at the house but his brother won't drive it because he thinks it looks cheap and old and that his friends might think lowly of him. So he was just teaching him a lesson.
I don't want to be looked down upon like this. WHAT SHOULD I DO? I DON'T WANT TO TELL MY BF ABOUT THIS. But it hurts badly :(
I never asked my boyfriend to fetch me. But he always insists to fetch me and drive me home. I feel so sick in the stomach thinking his family doesn't like me. While my family thinks of my bf as our own family member :(
Btw, I'm no worthless girl. I graduated college major in marketing. And we're living well. I'm not dependent on my boyfriend and never will. I don't want to be looked down like this. I don't know if its just because my boyfriend is Chinese and I'm Filipino and they have this "thinking" that I will use him for money. Heck NO!
My boyfriend always tells me that him and his mom doesn't have a good relationship and how much his mom makes his life cruel
- TealLv 74 years agoBest Answer
She doesn't know you and probably doesn't really have an opinion of you at all. In context, her words were clearly meant to express her anger at the situation and had little to do with you personally. You were never meant to see this conversation, and shouldn't have been snooping in the first place. Let it go.
The real problem is easy enough to fix. Tell your boyfriend that it's time for him to introduce you to his family and ask him to arrange something. It has been a year, unless they are horrible people he doesn't really have an excuse to put it off.
- DeeLv 74 years ago
I think this has more to do with her annoyance toward your boyfriend then it does you. She feels entitled to delegating to him a responsibility she believes she's owed because she bought hm a car. Because he was hesitant to pacify her other adult son by picking him up, she threw a temper tantrum, that's all. But say nothing about it and just live your life. My problem with this is you've never been introduced to her and that's why I said she was just angry with your boyfriend, but what would be the reason for him never introducing you? Obviously, since she doesn't know you, he's either not taking you seriously or she's just a miserable piece of work. Either way, don't be sick over anything but do ask him what's up. You deserve an answer and he's not a child so his mother shouldn't have anything to say anymore of whom he associates with. But, you have a right to know where or if the relationship is going anywhere. Good luck and ignore the cranky hag!
- No MoreLv 74 years ago
Wow, so that's what you got from all of that? One angry mention from his mother who was CLEARLY angry at HIM, and now you believe that his family doesn't like you?
Now, I have to wonder how you came to read a text from his mother on your boyfriends phone, unless he showed it to you. If he showed it to you, then THAT alone would open the door for you to share your feelings about what his mom said about you. But I wonder if the real reason you don't want to tell your boyfriend about this is because you were snooping on his phone without his knowledge, and would have to admit that to him if you mention the text.
So, your over the top reaction to a mere mention in a text, and the probability that you were snooping through your boyfriends texts tells me that you don't have a problem with the relationship, or lack of one with him mom. Your problem is the relationship that you have with YOURSELF.
Look, your boyfriend is 23. He's a big boy, and he has been dealing with his mother and the rest of his family all of his life. I am sure he can fight his own battles. BTW, I think what he did was right not to pick up his almost adult younger brother from school. The kid can find his own way home, it's not like he's 5. If that is the way your boyfriends mom is going to talk to HIM about his life, then that's for him to sort out, and you need to stay focused on your own issues.
If I am wrong about you looking in places you shouldn't, then by all means talk to you boyfriend. He should know how you feel about how his family views you. You deserve better than that no matter what.
But if I am right, and you were searching through his phone without his knowledge, then you need to look at yourself, and how you cope in a relationship. Most girls who snoop through their boyfriends phones aren't looking for communications with their moms. Their looking for something else, and you know the old saying, be careful what you look for, you might not like what you find.