I know I need to seek help but I feel like seeking help will ruin my plains?
I have a problem with addiction to pain pills. I know I need to get help for my issues however, I can be fine for awhile & then relapse and need them again. I'll convince myself that I'm fine nothing's wrong & then I'll relapse it's a horrible cycle.
I'm 28 years old I work, have a job, I have big plans to attend graduate school & move out of my home. I'm trying to save money & I feel like by going to "rehab" or "treatment" it would set me back with my goals. I know that sounds crazy but it's the truth.
I believe nobody really can "help me" with my issues going on. I feel like this would be a set back to go to treatment. I don't look at myself as a "huge" druggie since I don't use pain pills ALL the time. It's just sometimes.
I don't know what to do
I don't want to loose my job or quit or wind up on disability and have to explain to employers why I have this huge gap on my resume while I'm in treatment.
- ShannenLv 55 years agoFavorite Answer
The fact that you think seeking help will ruin your plans is ironic, considering it's NOT seeking help that will ruin your plans.
If you continue the way you are how long do you think it is before it starts to affect your work? How do you expect to complete school or have your own place? Those things will only add more to your stress and more likely push you even further to want the pills. You're still in denial and you need to be completely honest with yourself. Do you really believe that you can live the next 30+ years of your life this way? Someone will find out, or you will make a mistake somewhere along the way and even if you do manage to graduate and get your own place, what good is achieving all of that if you lose it because of your addiction?
And as the person above has already stated, seeking help for addiction doesn't necessarily mean you'll be committed into rehab. There's plenty of help and support out there for addicts that is specifically designed to allow you to continue to live your life. You have your commitments and your plans and that will be understood, but you can't deny the fact that you need to get over this addiction now whilst you can. There must be some part of you that knows how serious this is, otherwise you wouldn't have come on here for advice.
I can see that you try and justify your actions and not seeking help by saying "I'm not a MASSIVE druggie", but it doesn't matter HOW many pills your taking, the fact is that you're still addicted. If you rely on the pills to get you through your days or to fall asleep at night or to get through meetings at work or whatever it is, then that's an addiction. It doesn't matter what form the addiction takes, it's still an addiction and you have to acknowledge that. It's a hard and brave thing to admit, but once you have you'll be able to get the help and support you need and you will be able to live your life and carry on with the plans you have. There's no reason you can't do all of those things you want, but it won't happen unless you stop this now and get help. Stop making excuses and have the courage to make a change, you obviously want to, so just do it. It will be hard but it will be worth it in the end, when you do have your own place and you've graduated and you've achieved all of the things you set out to achieve.