Anonymous
Anonymous asked in 健康心理健康 · 7 years ago

「不自覺疏遠他人」和「主動破壞關係」的心理問題

男友和我認識的一個友人去了心理工作坊,男友得知自己在人際關係上有「不自覺疏遠他人」和「主動破壞關係」的問題,以致不論友情和戀愛上都老是出大問題,其朋友多次說「你再這樣就無朋友」,而我們也曾分手再復合兩次。

因為兩人拍拖,感情定會愈來愈深,但他潛意識會抗拒有人走近自己,變相只要拍拖拍下去,一到兩三個星期左右,感情一好了少少,他就會不自覺地做出一些事情來破壞關係。曾經嘗試提醒他有問題,但他會覺得無問題而笑著繼續堅持去馬。

例如……

嚴重遲到

多次放飛機

約會到中途突然丟下女友,去朋友家玩

女友有什麼要求就全部反著做

女友想要安慰的時候,就狠狠罵她

女友想一星期見一次面時,就提出要更多自由時間,逃避見面

女友想聊五分鐘電話時,就讓她等足一星期都沒一個電話

零電話零whatsapp零見面,拒絕溝通一兩星期

我找了很多心理學的資料,可能認識太淺,沒找到有這麼一個病症(只聽說過有一個男人也有同樣的問題),也不知道該用什麼療法來進行。

問題一:想在此找找心理學的高手來幫忙,這到底是什麼症,學名是什麼,有什麼療法?我想找到相關的資料和CASE STUDY。

問題二:現在安排了慈善機構的免費輔導,但不清楚到底輔導員只是社工還是心理醫生。畢竟以我所知在慈善機構後者並不太多,一個半月就排到的會不會只是社工?

2 Answers

Rating
  • 7 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    樓上網友說得對low self esteem no confident

    the cause is he want people to understand him but he dont want people understand him deeply, because no self esteem no confident, he is afraid being know too deep too clearly and being hurt by other, because he dontwant to show his weakness, he need to pretend to be strong, but underneath is very weak and small easily to be hurt, he response like that is just a 自我保護機制

    in other story he is no confidnet to companion too, because he think he dont deserve a good one as you, and afraid once you understand the real side of him, you will leave him

    2014-05-19 13:20:09 補充:

    mostly they have childhood shadow being dumb by parents , so no confident in human relationship

    2014-05-19 13:32:30 補充:

    to make it more simple for you to understand

    his subconsious already project the scence that you will dumb him,

    so he protect himself to dumb you first

    2014-05-19 13:40:01 補充:

    the cure method is make him face and recongize his childhood shadow

    but mostly he will denied to protect himself so is not easily to be cured,

    because no one will accept himself that he is sick and need to be cured

    unless someone offer a help heart by heart touch him deeply in heart

  • 7 years ago

    我只係心理學學生, 我估計你講既係low self-esteem.

    http://www.aliceboyes.com/low-self-esteem-and-rela...

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