How to describe a Christian wedding? I don't know much as I am not a Christian.?

I have been writing a story and the main characters are getting married. I am not a Christian but I have to describe a traditional christian wedding so I would like your help.

Well, I have heard the bride walks down the aisle with her father and the church and the vows they take. What vows do they take? What about the flower girl? What kind of flowers are usually there? Is music played? What does the bride feel? What kinda cake is there? Does anyone cry? How should I describe a church? I kinda want a lot of people there so it has to be a big church. Where are the flowers? What does the bride and the groom feel? How's the decoration? etc.

Please describe the wedding in paragraphs not a Q/A form.


Thanks dearly for all your help :)


3 Answers

  • 6 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    General Outline:

    Men wear suits (every man, even guests) or tuxedos (usually only the Groom, groomsmen and the fathers of the bride and groom) unless a casual ceremony is chosen.The bridesmaids, maid of honor or matron of honor usually have identical dresses, which might be full length, The flower girl is usually between 3 and 7 years old, wears a frilly dress in the color scheme chosen for the wedding and reception, and carries a basket containing fresh rose petals or other flower petals that might be dried or artificial. The ring bearer is a young boy about the same age as the flower girl. He wears a little suit like the groomsmen and carries a pillow flat in front of him, in the middle of which are tied with ribbon the wedding rings.

    It is considered bad luck for the groom to see the bride in her wedding dress prior to her walking down the aisle. This aisle is metaphorical, but most marriages usually do conform to having the women in the bridal party walk down a real aisle from the back of the church to the pulpit or stage like area with rows of bench seating (pews) on both sides.

    The wedding begins after all guests are seated. Her friends and family on one side of the room and his on the other. They are seated by ushers or the groomsmen. The men either take their places up front with the officiant (priest/minister/preacher -- labels depend on which Christian faith). All the men including the groom stand to one side up front. The groomsmen might escort the bridesmaids and maid of honor down the aisle. This is paced, but dancing down the aisle has been popular in recent years. Usually some music is being played it may be "Here comes the bride" or they might reserve that for the brides entrance. After the bridesmaids comes the flower girl and ring bearer. The girl is sprinkling petals from her basket. Someone helps the little girl and boy to a place to sit up front because they aren't expected to stand like the rest. Then the bride comes down the aisle escorted by her father, though nowadays it might be with both parents, a substitute for a parent or she might walk down by herself. It is not considered P.C. to have the father of the bride "give the bride away." as she is not chattel

    After they get up front, the minister might say, "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to unite in holy matrimony this woman (insert name) to this man (insert name)." There may be something about marriage being an institution ordained by God. There will probably be prayers if the marriage is a religious one, asking God's blessing. The preacher may ask if anyone knows of any reason why this man and woman should not be married, that they should speak up now or forever hold their peace. I've never heard of anyone ever saying anything back to this, but movies and TV shows like to have someone object in storylines. The vows are something like, "Do you John David Smith, take Jane Betty Doe to be your lawfully wedded wife, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, long as you both shall live?" You can look these up. Then the groom says, "I do" After that the same is repeated for the bride to answer. Then the priest says "Who has the rings?" The best man is usually holding these having got them from the pillow the boy brought up there. He hands them to the preacher who may say a blessing over them. They might say something about a ring being a symbol of love having no beginning or end and these are tokens of the vows they have taken. They each put a ring on one another. The preacher tells the groom that he may kiss the bride, though there are a couple denominations that do not like public displays of kissing, so they don't. They are presented as Mr. and Mrs. John Smith. The minister might make a closing remark about maybe punch and cake in the adjoining room or where to go for an elaborate reception with a full meal, dancing and merriment. The couple leave hand and hand first back up the aisle, followed by the bridal party. Then the people in each row are dismissed to leave in an orderly fashion starting with the pews in front, leaving single file up the aisle. In the lobby, there may be a receiving line, where the guests walk by the bridal party, congratulating the groom and offering best wishes to the bride. You are not supposed to congratulate the bride as that is bad manners. The sentiment is that he is the one that is lucky to marry her.

    Now, there are some Christian faiths that do not believe music in church should include instruments. So, there might be singing, but no piano. That is more rare. Some churches require church counseling before marriage and depending on the church this could be a matter of taking several classes or it might be just meeting once with clergy. Some churches require that the bride and groom agree to bring up any children in that faith or may require both the bride and groom to have been baptized in their particular faith. there are many denominations, some of which are considered cults by other Christian churches. Lots of Christians think the Christians of other faiths are not "true" Christians. A good example of that is how the Catholic Church does not count the baptisms of Mormons as being real Christian baptisms when the Mormons in question is converting to Catholicism.

    Everyone is usually very happy at a wedding, including the bride and when people cry it's usually because they are so happy. The flowers there are usually bouquets for each bridesmaid and the bride. Mothers and grandmothers have corsages. Groomsmen, the groom, the fathers and grandfathers all get boutineers. The priest might get one if he doesn't wear robes. Generally there are a couple of large flower arrangements up front at the ceremony. The aisle probably is decorated with bows on the pews or some kind of small flower decorations. There might be a little flower arrangement at the guest book table. There are flowers on the tables at the reception too.

    They might have a DJ or have a live band or maybe chamber music with some musicians playing harp, flute, and strings. Any kind of music might be played. The cake is usually tiered with the top tier being reserved for the bride and groom who take it home and stick it in the freezer to be eaten on their first anniversary. It's often a white cake with white frosting and doesn't taste that great. There might be a grooms cake too. The grooms cake used to be a kind of fruit cake that is soaked in rum, cut in tiny pieces, that are wrapped up in foil and tied with a tiny ribbon. The tradition associated with it was for unmarried girls to take a piece home with them from the reception. They were supposed to put this under their pillows and then it was said they would dream of the man they would someday marry. That is a tradition though and like the white dress and bouquets, is not a religious thing, it's just tradition.

    Churches are different. Some faiths prefer a lot of stained glass and may have statues and a big cross on the wall. There may be a steeple or a bell tower. Some have kneeling padded boards along the backs of the pews for people in the next row to kneel on while praying. Others don't kneel while praying. Some have a big baptismal that is at least waist deep and the person is submersed in it. Others just "sprinkle" water over the head during a baptism and don't need the big tank. Some churches are really informal and not buildings that were constructed to be a church. It may be a meeting hall that doubles as an American Legion Hall. If you want to describe a really big church, look up "mega church".

    O.K., I'm tired of writing, so I hope this is enough. :)

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  • 6 years ago

    The vows depend upon the bride and the groom. Some people write their own vows, some people let the minister performing the union use their regular vows. Flowers again depend upon the bride and the groom, since they pay for them- they choose one to go with their theme. I mean, you could pick any kind you want to help you describe your couple. There's the Wedding March that is often played, I think that's traditional. Churches all look different- again I think it would depend upon the setting of your story as to what kind of church is looks like.

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  • drip
    Lv 7
    6 years ago

    You should write about what you know. IF write about what you have no knowledge of, you need to do your own research. Go to a public library and dig into it. That is what an author does. It is a huge part of writing a story-doing the research on what you are writing. You don't ask random people on line.

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