is this change between past and present tense wrong?

I am writing a fictional story for a creative writing class and I feel like i shouldn't be changing between past and present tense like I am but it doesn't sound right if i leave it all in past. Here are some examples:

It was just after dawn and the crew of the Essex was getting ready to sail out on a two month long fishing trawl. The crew consists of Larry Smith, John O’leary, Henry Paul, Jackson Paul, Dave Patterson, Mike foster, and finally the captain of the ship, Steven McFly. The crew is all new to each other, none of them had any prior fishing experience with each other, well besides the two brothers, Henry Paul and Jackson Paul.

The first sentence is past tense, after that it is present.

another example:

The captain of the ship, Steven McFly, is a local to the Alaskan port they will be launching the Essex from. He has always been very respected by the people of the his small hometown. A few years ago he came back with a record amount of Halibut for all of Alaska.

At just around 6 A.M. the crew finished loading all of there gear and trawling equipment into the Essex. They all knew they had a long two months ahead of them. Despite the fear of the journey everyone boarded the ship and Steven began to steer the boat out into the ocean. While Steven navigated to their first stop, the rest of the crewman on board were getting to know each other better. Everyone besides Mike Foster who was sitting in his bunk alone.

First part is present, second part is pas

2 Answers

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  • Geomi
    Lv 7
    7 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    The quotation marks show where most of the changes are.

    The edited first paragraph should look like this:

    It was just after dawn and the crew of the Essex was getting ready to sail out on a two month long fishing trawl. The crew "consisted" of Larry Smith, John O’leary, Henry Paul, Jackson Paul, Dave Patterson, Mike "Foster", and the captain of the ship, Steven McFly. The crew was all new " "and not any of them had any fishing experience." "Two brothers, Henry Paul and Jackson Paul, did have a little experience."

    The edited second and third paragraphs should look like this:

    The captain of the ship, Steven McFly, is a local from the Alaskan port. They will be launching the the ship, the Essex, from there. McFly has always been very respectful of the people who come to his small hometown. A few years ago, he came back with a record amount of Halibut for all of Alaskan visitors.

    At around 6 A.M., the crew finished loading all of their gear and trawling equipment onto the Essex. They all knew it was going to be a long two months at sea. Despite that, everyone boarded the ship and Steven began to steer the ship into ocean waters. While Steven navigated to their first stop, the rest of the crew were getting to know each other better. On the other hand, Mike Foster was sitting on his bunk looking lonely and depressed. Good luck.

  • Anonymous
    7 years ago

    You don't read much, do you?

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