Anonymous
Anonymous asked in 社會及文化語言 · 7 years ago

大關英文作文的問題想問下

Hi, Tom, I am happy to have become your friend. Let me introduce myself. I am thirty one year olds. I live in Kowloon Tong. I have brother, father and mother. I like eating hamburgers becuase they are tasty. I have been dating Mandy for six months. We always go to Causeway Bay.I have been playing basketball since I was ten year olds. I have acquired skills in playing basketball.

以上篇文係介紹我自己,想問下d句子有無錯。

2 Answers

Rating
  • 7 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Leo,我幫幫你~ ☆ヾ(◕‿◕)ノ

    [今次你終於肯有信心一次寫一篇文出來,好!]

    Hi, Tom, I am happy to have become your friend.

    Hi, Tom, I am happy to be your friend.

    (這樣說簡單、直接、自然一點)

    Let me introduce myself.

    (OK)

    I am thirty one year olds.

    I am thirty-one years old.

    I live in Kowloon Tong.

    (OK)

    I have brother, father and mother.

    I live with my brother and my parents.

    (人人皆有 father and mother,因此不會這樣說。)

    I like eating hamburgers becuase they are tasty.

    I like eating hamburgers because they are tasty.

    I have been dating Mandy for six months.

    (OK,正如我之前 email 跟你說)

    We always go to Causeway Bay.

    (OK,正如我之前 email 跟你說)

    I have been playing basketball since I was ten year olds.

    I have been playing basketball since I was ten years old.

    I have acquired skills in playing basketball.

    (OK)

    連起來,整段文章可以是:

    Hi, Tom, I am happy to be your friend. Let me introduce myself. I am thirty-one years old. I live in Kowloon Tong. I live with my brother and my parents. I like eating hamburgers because they are tasty. I have been dating Mandy for six months. We always go to Causeway Bay. I have been playing basketball since I was ten years old. I have acquired skills in playing basketball.

    2014-02-11 12:22:06 補充:

    我贊同 Jenkin 的觀點。

    但我今次很欣賞發問者終於肯勇敢地踏出第一步,寫出一段文字再分析。

    對他來說是好開始。

    我一直也希望他的信心可以強一點。

    希望一步一步來吧。

  • ?
    Lv 7
    7 years ago

    have become your friend意思係已經係朋友-就不用介紹啦!所以我估你係對方接受成為朋友-英文這開始朋友關係叫know you as a friend或befriend(ed) you。介紹的內容零零碎碎,我把內容重整理一下,要有點文路,由細講到大(遠回憶到近代)似乎較合理(時間邏輯);另外學吓用連接詞把相關-有連繫關係或意思延續的句子連結,不能每一樣介紹都係好像餐單項目一句句獨立句。 Hi, Tom, I am happy to have known you as a friend. Let me introduce myself. I live in Kowloon Tong with my father and mother and a brother. I have been playing basketball since I was ten years old (不是year olds), therefore I have acquired skills in playing basketball. I like eating hamburgers because they are tasty. I have been dating Mandy for six months and we always go to Casueway Bay.

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