Mom and stepdad are getting divorced in a week. I love them both and don't know what to do?
I'm 19 years old and in college so I don't live at home but when I came home a couple months ago, my sister told me my mom and stepdad were having problems. I didn't think anything of it other than normal marriage problems until my stepdad told me today they were getting a divorce.
My stepdad has been my only real father figure since I was 7 considering my real dad is a drunk asshole who only cares about work. Me and my stepdad are very close and I call him "daddy" It's very obvious to me that the divorce is because of my mom who completely uses my stepdad and treats him like crap and he still does everything she wants. He's always been the most loving and caring person husband anyone could be.
I guess what I'm asking is:
1) Is there anything I need to say to either of them or should I stay out of it and let the divorce run it's course?
2) How do I balance seeing my mom, real dad, and my stepdad equally without hurting any of them?
- ?Lv 77 years ago
I'm sure this was a shock, but if your step father is unhappy, then he needs to do whatever helps him to gain his emotional health back. I'm sure that, if your mom has been taking advantage of him, he's not feeling that great about himself.
I would just be supportive of each of them, but not get involved in the details of the divorce. In otherwords, stay out of the middle.
As far as the time you spend with your family after the divorce, you're going to have to do that when you have the time.
Take care of YOU.
- BAMLv 77 years ago
1. Stay out of it. You don't know the real cause or reasons behind the divorce.
2. You are now an adult, so the typical custody issues shouldn't be at play. I would just let them all know what your wishes are in respect to equal time with all of them.
- 7 years ago
1. let then deal with their divorce. You can not change how the feel.
2. It is going to get rough for you. You just got to try to see them *** equally *** possible. Or who ever you feel more closer too.