Anonymous
Anonymous asked in 社會與文化語言 · 7 years ago

英文作文訂正 謝謝前輩們!

Bullying in my perception include many kinds, such as language,force,even racial

discrimination, it was happening in the all of the world.

Bully usually peak the most weak ones to bullying, they want to through this behavior to

control anying they want.

As a parents, they should know they have responsibility of molding their child's mentle

health, we can tell most bully have some problem with their mentle, even to feel inferior

If we want to know why have the bully, we should to observe their family and their homeschooling

, that maybe we'll to realize what's going on of bull's mind.

Except the parents and the bully-self, we should to teach everyone how to fight with

bully, if we don't want to be next sufferer of bullying, we should help sufferer in no

time.Don't be apathy about this.

本身文法很糟 讓大家傷眼了@@ 抱歉

Update:

Bully usually peak

打錯了 是pick...

2 Answers

Rating
  • 7 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    你的單字用的很多而且還不錯,就是文法很像中文的語法... ~"~a

    記得不要讓中文語法帶進去英文,英文有有英文的遊戲規則

    幫你潤稿吧!

    Bullying in my option includes many kinds, such as verbal, physical, even racial (這句也可以改成 such as of words, of body, even of race單字比較沒有複雜) and bullying can be discovered any corner of the world.

    (以下我幫你把句子順序重新排列,段落劃好,看起來前後邏輯才會比較連貫...)

    If we really want to understand what's going on in a bully's mind, we should observe the bully's family and home education. Parents should know their responsibility to be the role model for their children's mental health.

    Bullies usually pick the weakest ones, to control and do everything they want to. It's easy to tell that they feel themselves inferior.

    Bullying is a problem that we all need to pay close attention to, it's not just the problem to bullies and their sufferers.

    你自己再唸一次這篇文章,看看哪裡不懂的,或是哪裡可以用自己的話或是單字替換的,總之自己再好好思考一次關於英文的寫作方式,可以強化自己的實力,實力是點滴累積來的,不用怕寫錯,就怕你不思考

    祝你作文越寫越棒!! 加油!!

    2013-11-08 15:18:31 補充:

    其實你的單字量看的出來很不錯,文法如果不要太嚴格要求的話,其實對話是可以溝通的,但是如果可以的話,文法重新來溫習一次,把一些規則跟用法分辨清楚,然後透過不斷的練習來記住,文法錯沒關係,不知道文法錯比較慘,忘記了就再記一次就好,練習個10次絕對會破解英文文法啊啊啊

    Source(s): 加油!!
  • Louis
    Lv 7
    7 years ago

    同樣的內容不要提問兩次,否則會被系統強制刪去。

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