am I wrong to leave her?

I've been her boyfriend off and on... I'm 26 she's 23. I'm more of a I want her home with me and spending time with her in or out of the house, maybe even meeting up with hers or my friends, She wants to go out with her friends with out me and dosn't want me to know them well... she dosn't like staying at home, she hates it when I get jelous that her best friend spends any time with her cuz he's the one that yelled at her on text in Spanish about how he should of got'n a chance with her then me. that he was there for her before I got to know her... so from there on I never trusted him till he proves me different, she never wants me to get to know him and give me a chance to feel like he's not pulling any bull on me. she may believe him on saying that the text was for another chick but I don't believe it... she left for a full weekend to spend with friends... only coming home for about an hour... just to shower... we made love but I felt it was done just so that I could be ok with her leaving the place... she club'd and more with her friends and stay'd the night over there... I needed her home cuz I'm going through a tough time since I lost my job, and I'm losing my mind on thinking on where we are going to live and how are we going to survive... she dosn't like being around me when I'm like this but I needed her... at least to sleep by my side to make me feel like she's going to be there for me... is it wrong of me to do the same as she suggested to go out for a weekend but not come back till monday? well for her it was.. I decided to move out to my dads till I can find a job.... I broke up with her... but I still feel like a monster... she said she dosn't have any friends or family in this area to keep her till she could get on her feet.. I hate this worrying feeling... but I can't be around her anymore... it hurts.. she leaves when I need her by me... I need her love of being a gf/. not caring for sex I'm talking about cuddling, words of saying everything is going to be ok.. I needed that... she left to friends and I have no say in it... is it wrong that I'm doing what I'm doing? leaving? am I wrong? ooo and by the way.. she has a son... she actually has 3 but one is living with her now... well is coming back from a vaction from Colorado in about a day or 2 from now... I'm worried that she'll be homeless with her son... I know... it's not my problem... but to me... I feel like a monster for leaving... reguardless of all the bull she puts me through

1 Answer

  • 7 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    If you are going through a tough time in your life, you of course want your girlfriend to be there for you. That is what this whole relationship thing is about.

    There is nothing wrong with occassionally going out with friends. There is also nothing wrong with you wanting to stay at home sometimes. You know, your question seemed sort of general to me until I read that she already has three children, and only one is living with her.

    A young woman in that postion needs to be more interested in making a home for her family than she appears to be. Maybe your setting your boundaries and letting her know that you cannot live this way will help her learn that she needs to have different priorities.

    You should not feel any guilt because, from what I understand, you have been the person who is more settled. Do what you need to do to get your own life together before taking on anyone else's responsibilties. Maybe she will learn from your example, and if it hurts to see her, don't see her.

    There are plenty young women around who do not feel the need to leave their kids and go out partying with friends all the time. Good luck.

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