Teen troubles - Mother won't trust daughter?
Hey guys, I'm Samantha, I'm 14 going on 15 in September & I'm having a little issue at the moment - Actually, it's been long going. I've been dating a guy for about 8 months now and I can't seem to get my mum to approve. I don't know what I have done for my mum not to trust me, but for some reason, she just won't listen to what I have to say. I can't talk to her because I'm worried that she'll get mad, or she'll just put me down. I know my mum doesn't like me hanging around boys, which is understandable, but the guy I am dating is a nice, respectable guy. She is doing everything she can from keeping me from seeing him. She's always lying and making up fibs.. Just whatever she can so we can't see each other. How can I gain her trust? How can I talk to her about it?
I'm tired of being disappointed and not listened to. Help me, please?
- Anonymous8 years ago
Hi Samantha, the thing is trust is a lot like money. Earning it is hard, losing it is easy, and no matter how much you’re given, it may never seem to be enough.
What can you do to get your parents to trust you more and give you more freedom?
The Bible acknowledges that “a man will leave his father and his mother.” (Genesis 2:24) Of course, the same can be said of a woman. Whether you’re a male or a female, a vital objective of adolescence is to prepare you for adulthood —the time when you’ll be
equipped to leave home and perhaps raise a family of your own.
However, the transition to adulthood isn’t like a door that you simply walk through when you reach a certain age. It’s more like a stairway that you climb, step-by-step, throughout adolescence. Granted, you and your parents may have conflicting opinions as to just how far you’ve progressed up the stairway. The issue of trust can be a source of considerable tension between youths and parents. Is that true in your family? If so, how can you earn greater trust from your parents?
The apostle Paul wrote to first-century Christians: “Keep proving what you yourselves are.” (2 Corinthians 13:5) True, he wasn’t primarily addressing adolescents. Still, the principle applies. The degree to which you’re accorded freedom often matches the degree to which you prove yourself trustworthy. Not that you have to be perfect. After all, everyone makes mistakes. (Ecclesiastes 7:20) Overall, though, does your pattern of behavior give your parents reason to withhold their trust?
For example, Paul wrote: “We wish to conduct ourselves honestly in all things.” (Hebrews 13:18) Ask yourself, ‘What kind of track record do I have when it comes to being up front with my parents about my whereabouts and activities?’ Consider the comments of a few youths who have had to take a hard look at themselves in this regard. After you’ve read their comments, answer the questions listed below.
O Following through on my promises O Being financially responsible
O Getting out of bed without prodding O Speaking the truth
O Admitting mistakes and apologizing O Other ................................................................................
Keeping my curfew
O Being punctual
O Finishing chores
O Keeping my room clean
O Using the phone or computer in a balanced waySource(s): Questions Young people ask-answers that work Go to www.jw.org for more info-on how to regain trust in 'Young people ask Book'
- 8 years ago
Honey, mom knows best. Seriously, try talking with a respectable tone and no attitudes to her. Just ask her what she thinks is wrong with him and just try talking to her about what has been going on in your life. Offer to do some of her chores at home, ask her if yall can have a mother daughter day on sunday. Buy her food,perfume, things that make her happy, CHOCOLATE ! Trust needs to be earned and it takes time. Maybe your mother is going through something, ask her about herself.
- 8 years ago
My mother has the exact same problem.
- Anonymous8 years ago
Tell her that I am always watching him.