Wow, So that is what that book is all about, glad I didn't buy or read it.
But I've read hundreds of murder mysteries as I an sure, millions of others have, but never wanted to murder anyone.
Not there are some sex acts, that consenting adults may read about and wish to try, however, the key work is 'consenting adults' and you didn't consent.
It seems he's the type of guy, that is into this BDSM sex, and if he had a partner who felt the same, that's fine. To each his own.
But this isn't for everybody, and certainly not for you. The fact he went right at it, being rough, instead of trying some mild stuff to see if you liked it or not. Then stop when you tell him, you don't like it.
You need to lay down your law. this is not for you, and if that's what he's after, he should find a willing partner.
This certainly isn't a romantic sort of love making, and even though it's for some people, I'm sure it's not a big percentage of them.
If he says, this is what he wants, then, sadly, you need to give him his walking papers and find some nice decent romantic guy, who shares your feelings, and romance.
I think he's shown his true colors, and they aren't pretty ones.