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Would you say my Dad was too strict with me?

My Dad is a really successful author and we were very rich growing up in a large house just outside of Washington in a rich and beautiful area and we had great opportunities thanks to our Dad, I have no poor feelings to him, we are just like friends now, but I can't help but feel that he was a little too strict.

Our Dad had a hard childhood and he also suffers from obsessive compulsive disorder and anxiety disorder this made him very fastidious and bit of a hot head growing up but he was always loving and affectionate with me and my two sisters.

We did not go to school until we were eight, we were taught intensely at home by tutors and we all had to learn piano, do cross country, how to draw, ballroom dance and all the things that make gentleman (dressing, speaking, dining, laying tables) this was on top of all the other high school level lessons we received and we never got to watch television we always read books, we did not even have a television, we always had to dress smartly (chinos, white polo shirt, that sort of thing)

We also had to clean up after ourselves despite having two cleaners and he used to correct all of our mistakes from academic, to grammar, to hygiene and if we were ever naughty he used to slap our hands with a ruler.

When we were 8 we were sent to prepatory schools (8-13) that were really strict and did not allow much talking and separated boys and girls and focused loads of academics and it expelled students that got lower than a C average and he made us join the gymnastics clubs, learn violin and join the choir.

When we were 13 he sent us to another boarding school until we were 18 and he made us pick our own sport this time and a new instrument and insisted we join critical thinking club and attend university prep classes and join the school cadets, we basically had no freedom in what we did because he kept such close contact with the teachers and knew everything we were doing.

Also in the house we were never aloud to be loud or messy (we were to take that nonsense outside) and we all had to wake up at 7am every morning and get showered and dressed and do our homework in the library and do our chores and practice our instruments and we barely had any freedom, he was a complete dictator and we had to discuss the books we had been reading at dinner and he would be annoyed if we got anything less than an A in tests all that.

Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for it now, we all went to Ivy League colleges and we had the best grades, sports skills and a lot to put on our applications because of all the clubs and volunteer work we had to do (we also did volunteer work as a family) and we have all been very successful, both myself and my sisters.

Also when I think about my father I don't think straight about the discipline but I remember our family holidays and our sailing trips and him teaching me to drive and how to drive a boat and how we used to play tennis together, I really love him and he is a great guy (he is in his sixties now and still looks like he is in his late thirties, lol)

But in your opinion would you say he was too strict or just right, or not strict enough, or what?

5 Answers

  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Are you in therapy to recover from emotional scars he inflicted on you while growing up? No? Well, then I'd say he wasn't too strict. He turned you into a well-bred, successful, and motivated person and provided you with many opportunities others can only dream about -- that does require some degree of discipline. Do you know what happens to kids like you who grew up with opportunity, but with parents who weren't the slightest bit strict? They live in mom and dad's basement and talk about how they were in the advanced class in their high-school while begging their 20-year-old manager to make them full time at the grocery store. Think about it.

  • 8 years ago

    That's definitely really strict but i guess most ppl don't hire help or come from a wealthy family so we never had all those classes and forced when to wake up and shower and when to do our hw...also me and my siblings were definitely loud and crazy and always made a mess..we definitely got whipped with a belt for that(lucky, u only got a ruler to the hand lol). My youngest sis though, with her my parents did not hit her..they just learned to take away her tv, cell phone, comp etc when she did bad in school like got a D or F grade or did something bad like.. not show up on time when my mom has to pick her up from school and have my mom waiting outside too long or being late to school.

    We are all different though and you would not be who you are and got to go to an ivy league school if it was not for that type of childhood you had. Not sure about other wealthy kids but some wealthy families are pretty normal and not strict. That's my point of view coming from middle class family.

  • 8 years ago

    Firs of all I have to say that I found those (many, many) paragraphs up there hilarious.

    I'd say he was too strict. It's always effective, but I think there are better ways to go about it. Your life sounded like you were one of those friends from sitcoms who always said, "I can't hang out, I got piano lessons."

    Your dad sounds like a great guy buy the way, I wish i knew how to play an instrument or was athletic.

    I started this tradition where I say good luck after all my answers so,

    Good Luck.

  • 8 years ago

    just right i mean did he beat u when u acsidently drop a cup or let u smoke pot in front of him. he just wanted u to grow up to be the best u could be.

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  • 8 years ago

    Discipline is what is missing in our generation. So i think he is just right.

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