"Who am I?" C/c my poem please?
I whisper softly to nearby noses
Not often am I compared to roses
But I can swirl and twirl, falling slowly
And I can be dangerous, unknowingly.
I am the scent of fire in the air
I am the scent of danger, never spear
Burning throats, I am not liked by most
I come from the act of burning toast
Though sometimes, I am known as beautiful
You see me from chimneys, season is plent’ful
Grey and dismal is the color I wear
Much like the color of old peoples hair.
Who am I?
Gerald, as a human being I respect your opinion. I would however, like to know what about my poetry is awful, if you could please explain. Thanks for your time.
- 7 years agoFavorite Answer
You're an awful poet, that's who you are.
- ThomasLv 77 years ago
Usually speak of no one else, and just the poem, but answers such as Gerald's can be hurtful. I thought you handled his mess with class, much better than I could have. It is difficult to tolerate pinheads that make up fake accounts only to endow us with worthless drivel, we may have to see it but can at least express we don't like it. He won't explain Caitlin, and is too gutless to have email, but you stayed true to yourself, and that is what impressed me, and even Gerald I hope.
Your poem was good. You started strong with the first stanza, and ended strong on your last two lines. I do think this is good for a re-write, especially the middle stanza, where you might be able to say the same things with better flow, though I liked the sentence of being 'of danger, never spear' as if you are dangerous but you employ your force by will, not physical weapon.
"Who am I?" your title, and gather a personal poem: a person who is bright, pretty or even more so, and has overcome much, now ready to cross the hillock, embrace the beautiful horizon, and whether the sun is setting or rising, you will be there each day to see it through.
You are talented, and I would not be all surprised this was not a first draft you wrote in fairly short manner. Nothing wrong with that, and I would encourage you to keep writing.
- 7 years ago
I really don't know!? But your poetry is beautiful!:-)
- 7 years ago