Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 8 years ago

What to do about my ex-girlfriend?

I need your guys help bad. I was with my girlfriend for about 6 months before she went to study abroad. We decided that while she was gone we would stay together. Things at first seemed to be going okay. I should note that during the first two months I was a bit jealous and obsessive over what she was doing (I think this might play a big role in the situation). We managed to work things out as problems arose. After two months, she told me she was starting to get confused about us. She said she wasnt sure if she wanted to spend her last year in college together because she doesn't want to graduate without any friends. The reason she says this is because when we were together we spent so much time together and we ignored all other people in out lifes. I told her I'd give her space and time to think about it, but instead because I didnt want to be in limbo about the situation, I broke it off. For the next three weeks I decided to have no contact with her. After this I contacted her to check it and catch up. Nothing had changed. We told each other we still loved each other and reminisced about past memories. We still spoke to each other the way we used to and cried to each other about how much we miss and love one another. We continued to talk for a few days and I got really scared about what we were doing so I told her I couldn't keep talking to her again because I was scared to get hurt. We stopped talking for a week and I contacted her again because I realized it was stupid of me to cut off contact with someone I loved so deeply. We are currently talking every other day or so, but I'm unsure about whether this is a good idea. When we started speaking after the 3 week break I made sure to change my attitude as far as jealousy. She noticed this. I'm no longer asking her who's shes hanging out with and all that jazz. I knew I needed to change that or else I'd lose her. I feel more comfortable with myself these days and am less insecure (thank you prozac.) She's going to be abroad for 2 more months and will be doing an internship in NYC for another two months after that ( I live in California.) My hope is to visit her in NYC when she comes back to rekindle our relationship. I have a feeling that she has immersed herself in the study abroad trip and has forgotten about the beauty of our relationship. I need to make a decision soon because I dont want to keep telling her "I dont want to speak anymore." If this is what I should do then I will not explicitly tell her I dont want to talk anymore but rather just tell her I'm busy whenever she wants to talk. I want this girl back bad. If you guys believe there is any bit of hope then I'm not going to give up. I think the biggest impediment has been the distance and if we weren't so far away we could work this out. I'm super willing to work things out and allow her to experience everything she wants during her last year in college as long as she stays mine. We were each others first love. Please help.

2 Answers

  • 8 years ago

    Go out and make new friends and start new hobbies so you will not think about her so much. It sounds like you guys are young and most young people go through a lot of trials. It is possible you will have more girlfriends and fall in love with them as well. It is also possible that when she comes back you guys might pick up where you two left off. If you and her were meant to be, you guys will be together. Try not to worry and remember that life can be very hard at times but everything always works out in the end.

  • 8 years ago

    Get her out of your mind!

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