Poem "Aftermath" Thoughts?
The bombs were dropped
Everything in the world stopped
People stood gasping
As buildings around were collapsing
Countries were at war
Hatred sewn deep in people’s cores
Skies have become dark
The mushroom cloud’s mark
No children will be born
As people will lay dead and torn
Nuclear power is feared
It wipes continents clear
Of any and all life
The bombs take flight
And children cry in the night
When their mother’s die
And the world ripped wide
Lost in smoke and radiation
- ThomasLv 78 years agoFavorite Answer
Funny you should write on this topic. Slightly similar, I wrote one
today called Anarchy 2013 A.D.
I liked this, structurally and the storyline, a gripping read, eldritch.
Rhymes and near rhymes were good, but is looks like you sort of
lost it in the smoke and radiation there at the end, which might have
been a good, intentional move on your part.
I still think one this long, with this subject, and lyrical, could use some
breathing room with 4 stanzas and a couplet, but as is works too, to each
his own. Good flow and sentence length was consistent.
- 8 years ago
I like it