I found out that my boyfriend has epilepsy. Will this strain the future of our relationship?

When I try talking to him about it to find out what kind he has and stuff he gets really shy and doesnt want to talk about it. I found out that he uses the medicine oxcarbazepine though (4000ml every night). Is that a serious medication? I cant find too much info online than just the basics.

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  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Look at it this way: how would you feel if the roles were reversed?

    Epilepsy is not a disease. People are ostracized for it all the time, especially in their teen years. So he needs to be able to trust that you will not leave him if he is honest with you. And he needs to be honest, so you I'll know what to do if he has a seizure.

    Almost everyone with epilepsy is on medication. The main issue with ozcarbazepine is that it lowers sodium levels, so he needs to have his level checked frequently.

    Source(s): 38 years complex and simple partial seizures; epilepsy advocate
  • 8 years ago

    I had a girlfriend who had epilepsy. She used to have a couple of grand mal seizures everyday even though she was on medication. I can't say it strained our relationship. The only awkward thing in my opinion is that her epilepsy became part of her identity. But I guess she had to do this. Anyway, it didn't affect our relationship too much.

    Just one other thing: she was barred from some local restaurants. I guess customers complained about her keeling over and jerking around on the floor.

  • whimsy
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    nowadays it is possible to control epilepsy, nothing can cure this condition. however, i don't think that it controls it 100%, so you have to decide whether him having epilepsy is a deal-breaker in your relationship. No one else can make that decision for you.

    i was under the impression that the medication had to be taken twice daily, i.e. every 12 hours.

  • Bill
    Lv 6
    8 years ago

    well all in all, everything should be fine. there are some precautions to deal with, but as long as he does not skip his meds, he should be fine.

    i used to try to date a girl that was epileptic. she only talked about it with me one good time, as she was very shy to that subject as well. she said she hated having it, and that it made her feel like she wasn't normal. she could work and drive and do plenty of things that normal people can do. she did have to pay special attention to her diet and any alcohol was a no no. she said that the meds were very expensive (over $500 a month) and that her family had them shipped from Mexico to save on the cost. every now and then a seizure would hit her and she said that once at a family gathering that she fell off the toilet and went into convulsions. all of that was very embarrassing for her, because family members found her partially unclothed. i think every now and then she would just feel dizzy too. but she lives with it, and is basically a normal functioning member of society.

    also my uncle's stepfather dealt with epilepsy his whole life. later on in his years, he decided that he would cut back on his medication to try and save money. maybe like only eating half the pill that he was supposed to be taking daily. he hadn't had an episode in something like 20 years. well, just 3 days after putting himself on this new regimen, he had a seizure. so that just goes to show how serious all of this really is. he went right back to taking his recommended dosage.

    i think some people that are epileptic feel that they are stigmatized due to their disease. they don't want any special attention because of it. but they are normal people, they just have something extra to deal with every day.

    best wishes to you

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  • 8 years ago

    I would just leave it for a while... let him talk to you about it rather than the other way round. I'm sure he just wants a little more time to talk to you about it.

    If it this keeps happening just tell him that you want to know more about it because you love him- only if you actually do love him. and that you want to know what to do if anything happens to him whilst you are with him.

    it shouldn't strain your future relationship- just take it easy and try not to act any differently :)

    hope i helped!

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