Lv 4
emzarr asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 7 years ago

I cant handle my mums depression anymore and I dont know what to do?

We've had events happen in life in the past 5 years which have had a negative effect on the whole family... My mothers mum moving in with us after she split from her husband, mum having a big falling out with her brothers, mum and dad seperating, selling the family home, dramas of finding somewhere to live.

I understand that all of this would be hard to deal with, especially since she has depression which I have too, but it's really not good for my 14 year old brother. If she's not moping around the house then she's in bed all day. My brother hasnt consistently gone to school in a long time also.

Sometimes I just want her to snap out of it or tell her what I see and how I feel but I know she'll get defensive and/or try to hurt me. She's easily insulted.

I cannot deal with it anymore. I'm sick of living in a house with no structure and miserable people. I try to take care of as much as I can so she doesn't have to but it doesn't help.

Some times I really want to move out (i'm 20 now) but I worry about my brothers well being. I wouldn't want to leave him here while mum is so emotionally unstable.

She'll come right again in about a week, then something else will trigger her depression.

I can't deal with it anymore, especially when i'm trying so hard myself not to fall back into a depressive state.

8 Answers

  • 7 years ago
    Best Answer

    Oh sweetie, I know what you going through because my mother is the most evil person on this planet. She hates my father and I. She also enjoys to act sick every weekend and spend the day in bed and then take her moods out on everybody. I'm 21, and would move out in a flash to my bf but I can't and won't leave my dad behind to suffer there alone.

    She is ruining my life. Every day she wakes up its her complaining 24/7. I honestly feel like pushing her off a balcony sometimes, or just punching her. . But obviously can't do that. She also provokes me and tells me to hit her ect and I just walk away from it. . And She goes on and on. . I'm telling you she is evil.

    Okay well hope that makes you know you not alone in an unhappy home. What you should do about your mom is make her go to a doctor for depression. Or get your younger brother to speak to a teacher at his school about how your mom is treating you guys. Maybe the school can help with getting your mom the treatment she needs.

    Living with a depressed person is awful. I know. Maybe write her a letter about how unhappy you are and that she must see a doctor. Maybe that will be better so that your mother doesn't snap at you.

    I really hope things get better for you. Try be there for your brother please, without you and your guidance he can land up dropping out of school, doing drugs etc. Good luck.

  • 7 years ago

    I understand where you are coming from I was brought up in a household where all my family members suffered some sort of metal illness. I myself suffered with severe depression at only the age of 14, I didn't care what happened to me or my family I guess the only thing to do is to be supportive towards her , tell her how your feeling but not in an offensive way maybe see if she can seek professional help , if she hasn't already . Make sure you are there for your brothers they need you more than ever!!! Just remember the road to life has many detours , head up and stay strong!x

  • Teresa
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Let him know how important he is to you. Try to convince him that if he is more optimistic in life that he will have better chances at having good days. Try to spend some time with him that is not around things that make him upset. When you have the talk with him, do it in a serious setting. If you feel threatened one-on-one with him, take it to a public place that has room for privacy but you two arent alone. The most important thing is to not look like you will do everything for him and that you have a life on your own. Something that makes parents the most proud is when they see their offspring suceed, especially (in your circumstances) when they have been faced with divorced parents and other difficult obstacles.

  • Anonymous
    7 years ago

    I would suggest you find someone to help with your moms depression. Get her a councillor and some one to look after her and keep an eye on her. For yourself, only do what makes you happy, focus on the positive in everything, smile ;) move out if you want, this can stop you from becoming depressed like ur mom. As for your bro, get a relative to look after him for 4 or so years until he can move out. X

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Anonymous
    7 years ago

    Find a job immediately and become financially independent.

    Then take care of your Mother.

    Ask your Mother to find another man in her life.

    What cannot be cured should be endured.

  • 7 years ago

    There is a line from a very old hymn: "Take it to the Lord in prayer". But on a practical level, seek counselling yourself. Both (together) I'm sure, will provide your anwer.

    Source(s): Experience of 92 years.
  • 7 years ago

    You stand back and let it run it's course. In most cases, there is nothing you can do.

  • 7 years ago

    Get her some help cuz its only gonna get worse if you dont

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.