可以請幫我看我的英文有那裡的文法或用詞有錯的嗎? 或是修改哪個地方會讓文章更符合國文原稿呢??? 能幫我把不合適的地方挑出來嗎? 謝謝!!
My hobbies are ridding a bicycle, listening to music and enjoying delicious food. I was brought up in ___ where there is a beautiful country of great weather. Now, I am __ years old, and I was born on __. I come from a quite happy rurally household. Next time, I will introduce my family, there are five people in my family, including my dear grandmother, my parents, my brother and I. I am always the one that makes family happy. I am feeling my home with laughter. I personalized very easy-going and positive, but sometimes I am forgetful, also. I was often muddleheaded, get others into trouble. It is my need to improve. I live in a village full of human touch. When have a big pressure, I like to listen to music and make daydream under the tree? My father is a farmer, and I often help him in the fields. Because I grew up in the countryside, so I very much like the nature of life. I remember catching fish in the stream next to our house with my older brother when we were young; I remember bicycle racing with my friends. However, once riding too fast and fallen into the field, cause my whole body to get dirty, and cause my mother was very angry. Species many kinds of fruit in the house, so I often wear armless and rain boots, go to the fields with help during the holidays. At the time, is my can relax and talk to a lot with family's moment. I hope oneself can be an excellent nursing in the future. I hope you all can toward dream advance for smooth.
- 7 years agoBest Answer
正常來說，你第一段的主題句是hobbies，整段就應該對hobbies多做說明，而不是跳到不相關的出生地和生日，除非他們和你的hobbies 有連結。Besides, There is much information in your article. It should be separated into different paragraphs so your readers can understand you more easily.
My hobbies are riding a bicycle, listening to music and enjoying delicious food. I was born in ___--- a beautiful country town of great weather. My birthday is March 9th, and I am __ years old now. I am from a happy family in a quiet rural area. Next, I am going to introduce my family members. There are five people in my family, including my dear grandmother, my parents, my brother and I. I am always the one that makes my family happy. I fill my home with laughter. My personality is very easy-going and positive, but sometimes I am forgetful, too. I was often muddleheaded, got others into troubles. It is something I need to improve. I live in a village of great friendly atmosphere. When I’m under big pressure, I like to listen to music and make daydream under a tree. My father is a farmer, and I often help him in the fields. Because I grew up in the countryside, I like the life of nature very much. I remember catching fish in the stream next to our house with my older brother when we were young; I remember bicycle racing with my friends. Once, I rode too fast and fell into the field, got my whole body dirty, and my mother was very angry about it. We grow many kinds of fruit in the farm, so I often wear my rain hat and rain boots to the fields to help my family during the holidays. This is the time I can really relax and talk to my family. I hope I can be an excellent nurse in the future, and I also wish all of you can go for your dreams without no difficulities.Source(s): Hey! I'm an English teacher.
- 河小豚Lv 77 years ago
Interested in bicycling is like listening to music and enjoying good food. I was born in ____, it is beautiful and the weather was a good city and County. I am ___ years old, I was born in ___ month ___. I come from a very happy rural family, now I would like to introduce my family, there were five people in the House, Grandma MOM and dad my brother and me. I was home the pistachio, I the home full of laughter. My personality is easygoing and optimistic, but sometimes I forget. I often confused cause trouble to others, this is what I need to improve. I live in the village with a human face. When the pressure is big, I like to sit under a tree listening to music to daydream. My dad was a farmer, I have always to lend his hand in the field. Because growing up in the countryside so I like nature's life. Remember as a boy, and caught fish in the stream next to the brother at home, competition cycling with friends, remember one time riding too fast and fell into the field all dirty, mother angry. Species in many different kinds of fruit, so a holiday I often carry hats and wearing rain boots, arm going to working the fields, now I can relax and his family have time to chat up. I hope that in the future will become an excellent nurses. Hope we can proceed smoothly towards a dream.