I cannot handle school anymore?
I started school today and hated it, I was so scared I was gonna have a break down today. I was so scared I was gonna cry, be centre of attention then have to explain why I was crying, I hate school so bad.
1. The "bad" students waste the other students time by misbehaving so we don't get the "full" lesson, and it annoys me, its REALLY selfish , it makes the teachers think we're all like that, cause they've had enough and also, they're humans too, and why bother going to a lesson if you're only going to be taught a little bit, and not even correctly.
2. Its frustrates me to know that I have to do the work and homework for subject I really don't care about, etc, geography, history, science .. , if there were any "useful" information, why don't they just teach us that.
3. I don't know what's wrong with me but sometimes I haven anxiety or anxiety like attacks when I think about how long school is and how I have no freedom, not in like selfish way but, I feel "closed" when I think about or realise that I cannot just escape from situations or just go out for my state of mind without a valid reason or my mum picking me up.
4. Its even harder to go through the day when you need to cry, but you can't because there's no where to hide or escape or anybody to help you or save you. Today in history, I literally had to close my eyes and put my jumper under my eyes(discreetly) to stop the tears or to prevent them. I literally had to lie to my self JUST to keep sane and not cry. I would tell my self "only 5 minutes then you're out of here, you can go home and sleep, you can go on a