Generic asked in Arts & HumanitiesPoetry · 8 years ago

Help finding a poem, like a boss?

Several months back, I stumbled a poem online that ends each verse with, "Cause when I (5 syllables), I do it like a boss." For the life of me now I can't find it. Does anyone know what I'm talking about?

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  • 8 years ago
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    Like A Boss by The Lonely Island

    Mr. Samberg, thanks for coming to your performance review.

    No problem.

    So you're in charge around here, is that fair to say?

    Absolutely, I'm the boss.

    Well, so take us through a day in the life of, "The Boss".

    Well the first thing I do is--

    Talk to corporate (like a boss)

    Approve memos (like a boss)

    Lead a workshop (like a boss)

    Remember birthdays (like a boss)

    Direct work-flow (like a boss)

    My own bathroom (like a boss)

    Micro-manage (like a boss)

    Promote synergy (like a boss)

    Hit on Deborah (like a boss)

    Get rejected (like a boss)

    Swallow sadness (like a boss)

    Send some faxes (like a boss)

    Call a sex line (like a boss)

    Cry deeply (like a boss)

    Demand a refund (like a boss)

    Eat a bagel (like a boss)

    Harassment Lawsuit (like a boss)

    No Promotion (like a boss)

    5th of vodka (like a boss)

    **** on Deborah's desk (like a boss)

    Buy a gun (like a boss)

    In my mouth (like a boss)

    Oh **** man, I can't ******* do it, ****!

    Pussy out (like a boss)

    Puke on Deborah's desk (like a boss)

    Jump out the windows (like a boss)

    Suck a dude's dick (like a boss)

    Score some coke (like a boss)

    Crash my car (like a boss)

    Suck my own dick (like a boss)

    Eat some chicken strips (like a boss)

    Chop my balls off (like a boss)

    Black out in the sewer (like a boss)

    Meet a giant fish (like a boss)

    **** his brains out (like a boss)

    Turn into a jet (like a boss)

    Bomb the Russians (like a boss)

    Crash into the Sun (like a boss)

    Now I'm dead (like a boss)

    Uh huh. So that's an... average day for you then.

    No doubt.

    You chopped your balls off and died.

    Hell yeah.

    And I think at one point there you said something about sucking your own dick?

    Nope.

    Actually, I'm pretty sure you did.

    Nah, that ain't me.

    OK, well this has been eye-opening for me.

    I'm the boss.

    Ya, I know, I got that. You said it about 400 times.

    I'm the boss.

    Ya, ya, I got it.

    I'm the boss.

    No, I heard you, see you later!

    (like a boss)

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