Why are Christians so boring?

Christianity spells monotony. I feel like being a Christian means not enjoying life. No premarital sex, partying, enjoying Sundays, making dirty jokes, cursing, or having any fun in general. Every Christian I've ever talked to is so monotonous and God-fearing, it's hard to be around them. Personally, the... show more Christianity spells monotony. I feel like being a Christian means not enjoying life. No premarital sex, partying, enjoying Sundays, making dirty jokes, cursing, or having any fun in general. Every Christian I've ever talked to is so monotonous and God-fearing, it's hard to be around them. Personally, the weather doesn't amuse me. Why can't they just let loose and have fun? It seems like you can't even have fun in the afterlife, try and get smashed off of that holy wine and God might kick you out on your ***.
Update: @No Chance Without Jesus

HAHAHATATATATA *douchey pretentious laugh* Because you ARE certainly the chosen one by Jesus, right? Which makes you SOOOO much more mature and above everyone.
How elitist!
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