Anonymous asked in Arts & HumanitiesBooks & Authors · 8 years ago

Help with my character please?

I have an awesome male lead character, but I'm having a really hard time coming up with his love interest. I write guys so much better than women. The women/teen girls I write always sound Mary Sue to me or too bland. Blah. Or standard characters that you see in too many books already.

My main male character deserves someone who is tough but not hard, smart but not unbearable, and as interesting as he is. I have listed a couple of prototypes for his girl Friday - please let me know which one you like best and why! Thanks! I also included a brief description of him with a link to a pic of what I am imagining him to look like. Your helpful, nice, specific answers are always appreciated :)

Male lead pic link:

Description: 18ish and just graduated H.S. Quiet, watchful, not trusting of others. He has a few good friends but not very social. Yet he isn't antisocial - he's just a nonconformist who is just himself. Very protective of his mom and little sister after they got beat up and put in the hospital by his mom's ex. He isn't a sentimental, heart-to-heart kind of guy. He shows his love for his family by helping with the bills and taking care of things. Actions speak louder than words to him. His flaws - too proud, a bit paranoid, and anal about details - has to have things orderly especially in his spaces (his room, car, etc.) Has to have some control of his environment and life but yet he isn't controlling with people.

Jane Doe's Physical description: Medium length light brown hair, tan skin, chin a little pointy, intense brown eyes, slim build 5'6" (she looks healthy not model skinny). Pretty but in an understated way. Not a huge guy magnet.

Jane Doe #1: She grew up with 3 older brothers who like to try to push her around and/or treat her like she is invisible. As a result she is assertive and in your face at times. She had to be that way in order to be heard by her family. They tend to treat her like a baby, but after she got her butt beat at school by a gang of girls they made sure to teach her self defense. Her strengths: not easily intimidated, a loyal friend, and tenacious. Her flaws: bull-headed, not very empathetic, and often acts like she has something to prove.

Jane Doe #2: Still has older brothers, but this character is shy and sometimes people feel like they have to protect her. She feels like just because she has trouble talking to people and blushes a lot doesn't mean she is stupid or weak. Enrolled herself in self defense classes because she feels like if she can defend herself then she will act more confident and people will stop treating her like she's glass. Strengths: sweet, empathetic, and loyal. Flaws: shyness prohibits her from being herself, doubts herself a lot because of the way people treat her, and often jumps to conclusions/judgmental.

Jane Doe #3: Lives with her step dad since her mom skipped out on them when she was 10. Step dad is decent but really busy with work so they lead pretty separate lives. She is very independent and has been working different jobs since she was 12 (babysitting, dog walking, fast food, etc.). She doesn't like feeling dependent on her step dad so has always been focused on making her own way in the world. She has a few close friends that she considers to be her surrogate family. Strengths: independent, lots of common sense, and people smart. Flaws: too suspicious, a little superficial, and arrogant.


Please keep in mind these are brief descriptions - I know it is hard to judge much about a character without reading more about them, but please try to keep an open mind. I have spent a lot of time writing several different scenes with this guy and several prototypes of her - but I just can't seem to get it right if you know what I mean. Thanks for your feedback!

10 Answers

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I really like your second character because I haven't seen her a hundred times before. She has a complex realism I find compelling. You're so right; just because someone blushes does NOT make them stupid or weak. I know this from personal experience. I don't like to talk about myself, butI have a demanding, high tech professional career, but people often assume I'm less intelligent than I am simply because I am a bit reserved at times and still blush occasionally.

    Strip away my medical persona and I'm back in high school again all these years later (sometimes). You're right, again, in that being like that, having been rather harshly judged in the past as being less than bright or even stuck up does make me a bit quick to judge others, sometimes rather too harshly in return, but it's also honed my intuition to a razor fine edge. That literally saved my life, at least once for certain, when I chose not to trust someone because I got a "bad feeling" about him. He turned out to be a very bad man, the worst sort of man for a woman to be alone with.

    I think the character you described would naturally be drawn to someone like her. It seems to fit his character and circumstances more so than the others. She also "rounds him out" nicely. They fill in each other's "gaps" in a way. Her intuition, empathy and loyalty make communication easier than it would be with someone with harder edges, yet there is plenty of room for drama when needed as well if you wish to go in that direction. They are enough alike to be great friends, but different enough not to bore each other to tears.

    I like this girl, actually I like them both already and hope you choose her. Best of luck with your writing. I'd love to know how it goes!

  • 8 years ago

    My vote is for girl #3 because she is the most his equal in self-sufficiency. The guy already has his mother and his sister to protect; he doesn't need to have to protect the girl, too.

    I think, though, that you should also come up with some ways in which he and she complement each other--where he's weak, she's strong, and vice-versa. Both people can't be all things, but either one of them can help the other when needed; that's what would make them a team. Maybe she is good at fast-talk, and he isn't. Or he's good at math, and she isn't, or whatever.

  • 8 years ago

    I prefer the first one. I don't understand why people are picking the second and claiming it is 'new'- it's not. Number two is extremely close to the Mary Sue's of today's YA (shy, not much self-esteem, but later on come into themselves with the help of their man who protects them). The guy is already protecting people, but he chooses to do so. It would make more sense for him to become intrigued with her because she doesn't need to be protected. He would find that refreshing, and since he isn't controlling wouldn't mind that she prefers to be independent and isn't afraid to call him on his crap (if there is any) and maybe, because she's different, she can be the one who pulls him out of his all too serious phases. Perhaps you can mold one and three together and get a great independent, hard-headed, sweet person who can balance him out.

  • 8 years ago

    Personally I would pick number two right away. Because she is shy, it gives him a chance to "protect" her like he does his mom and sister since that is what he knows and is presumably good at but since she is enrolled in self defense classes she will have the opportunity to change and become a more independent person and then he can let up on his protectiveness because he doesn't necessarily want to be watching all these females all the time. But I think initially they will click very well in your story and they will seem more natural together because they are both people who seem like they would be looking for that one person to be with, they aren't messing around with people's hearts or looking for a fling because neither of them are social enough for that or seem like people who would want that. They would both want an honest relationship I would think. And since he isn't heart to heart, he won't make her blush all that often cause he won't be outright saying how much he cares about her, he would show it through his actions and what he does for her and how he treats her. And if he is not controlling with people, that works well cause she is trying to break out and change/ proof herself and he will allow her to do that and grow within their relationship.

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  • Daryn
    Lv 4
    8 years ago

    I like #1

    I like it because there are a LOT of stories and movies and stuff that have these tough female characters who save the guy's butt all of the time and they become some super hero perfect at everything along with beautiful and the guy is always impressed with fighting and manipulation skills.

    And boy is that getting dull.

    There is no problem with a girl being able to fight.

    There's a problem if she is saving the guy's butt all the time.

    I think that she can act a bit tough, but knows her place... She IS tough but not tougher than the guy. You want the guy to feel proud of himself for protecting, teaching, etc the female.

    I dunno! That's what I think! Lol.

    Don't make her a wimp, and don't make him a wimp. People seem to think there has to be a weak link in the relationship. So it's either a girl that you struggle to keep track of and they scream at everything. Or a guy who is always being retarded and trying to prove something so she has to save him.

    It's just wrong.

    Done with my little rant. ;P

    I'm glad you pay close attention to characters! There's lack of it these days! :)

    Merry Christmas!

  • 8 years ago

    I think number three is probably the best one to use, because in my opinion, there's nothing better than independence as a strength. Also, it's good to use someone with a complicated background and past, because it adds a lot of interest in the storyline and plot. I hope this answer helps you ;)

    Source(s): My brain...
  • 8 years ago

    Someone like Jane doe #1 is a risk taker. She knows she might be sorry later when she does take risks, but it's worth it too her. Why not a cowgirl? She's a rodeo queen. Sounds just like something

    she'd be.

    I like Jane doe #1.

  • 8 years ago

    Jane Doe #1

    She'll be a like-able character and easy to write about since you're better with guy characters and she's a bit tomboyish.

  • 8 years ago

    I agree 2

  • 8 years ago

    2 please.

    gives him something to do (protect her feelings, open her up) rather than being so damn anal.

    they could equalize each other.

    have fun please.

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