Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 8 years ago

I have been "helping" my amputee son, and I have not told my husband, and not sure how?

My son lost his arms when he was 9 years old, and now he is 14.

I am not sure how to say this, but in the past 3 months. I have been helping my son masturbate since he has means of doing it himself and asked me to help me.

I know that this is a natural part of boys growing up, and I did not want him to deprive him of one more thing because of his disability.

However, my husband doesn't know about this and I am not sure how to tell him.

What do I do?

Update:

Guys, please don't get mad at me.... He has no arms and there is no way he can do it himself... He doesn't have a girlfriend, and I think it's fine because I help him clean in the shower/bath anyways....

21 Answers

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  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    why don't you stop asking this silly question?

    does asking it follows a regular period for example once a month?

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    He'll find out eventually and it'll be better that it comes from you rather than blurted by your mother, or from another source. But when he does find out, it will be very hard on him. You should think about getting his support system ready before you tell him. A therapist, social worker, or councilor may be a good idea, for the whole family. A professional may be able to help you and your husband tell your son in the least tramatic way, and than be able to help your son cope. It will be very stressful for you, your son, your husband and your daughter, so somebody to talk to outside the situation could help you guys readjust. He's at the age now where he'd be old enough to understand and that any rebellion may not be too severe (unlike at 15 or 16 where he could drop outta school, become an alcholic, drug addict, or run away to find his biological father). But make sure he has Somebody besides you guys to turn to so that this doesn't just fester in him. You can put this off another year, two at the very most (any later and he may never forgive you), but if you think he's mature enough to understand that do it sooner- rather than later. And in the mean time start building up that support system!

  • Anonymous
    6 years ago

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    RE:

    I have been "helping" my amputee son, and I have not told my husband, and not sure how?

    My son lost his arms when he was 9 years old, and now he is 14.

    I am not sure how to say this, but in the past 3 months. I have been helping my son masturbate since he has means of doing it himself and asked me to help me.

    I know that this is a natural part of boys growing up, and I did not...

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  • 5 years ago

    For the best answers, search on this site https://shorturl.im/avDzW

    You are his mother and you want to protect him. Thats natural, and we wouldnt expect anything less from you. However, as a human he has a right to know who his biological father is (and is not). 9 is probably too young. Wait until his teens when you think he is ready. Tell him with his father (your husband), he should be there too, to show your son that he is his father no matter what. Be confident in your parenting. If you have raised him well, he is not heading toward the road of disaster. Consider the consequences of what could happen if you dont tell him, and he finds out through some other source. Besides, he will need his birth certificate some day for something.

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  • 5 years ago

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    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Mom Helps Son Masterbate

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  • 6 years ago

    You do understand that by doing that to your 14 year old son is molestation and rape with a child. Its illegal! Even if your son asks you its still molestation and a huge felony. You should be arrested or the child needs to be removed from your home. The husband needs to know so he can get his son professional help because his mom sexually abused him.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    im pretty sure that is sexual abuse to a minor and u should see a theraistr. masturbation is not exactly "normal" for everyone so ur son does not "need" it and u shouldnt be helping him....... just because he has a disability doesnt make it ok to have a rape setion with him and call it "helping"

  • 8 years ago

    I understand that at his age masterbation is normal, but your helping him is inappropriate. Before you ever did this you should have consulted a doctor on how to provide him with the means to masterbate by himself. I can't give you advice on what to say to your husband because this is so inappropriate and I can't believe a parent would touch their child in this manner.

  • 4 years ago

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