Hello, I'm from the antigun lobby, I propose a legislation to make America safer from violence and harm...?

Cars with over 100 horsepower should be banned. They are dangerous and deadly.

> Any vehicle that can exceed the speed of 75 MPH should be confiscated from the owners. We can do this because every vehicle is registered to an address.

> If you are caught with any vehicle that can exceed 75 MPH, it will be confiscated and you will be given a felony offense with life in prison... because you are so dangerous.

> You don't need a 300 HP Mercedes to drive to work. You don't need a 400 HP S.U.V. to go to the grocery store.

> You shouldn't be able to have a house over 5,000 sq. feet.

> You don't need that much stuff to fill up the house.

> You're wasting energy to keep it heated in the winter and cool in the summer for rooms you are not in.

> You are creating a bigger carbon footprint for the construction and maintenance of the house, thus killing other people through excessive pollution.

> All knives should be banned.

> You don't need kitchen knives longer than 7 inches.

> People stab other people with knives.

> You don't need a gas oven or stove top.

> People get burned on those... electric too.

> Everything should be cooked via microwave.

> Everything should come pre-sliced so all you need is a fork.... wait, forks are dangerous too.

> Everything should come in smoothie-form. So you can slurp it with a flexible straw, or use a soft rubber spoon.

> If you want to protect yourself and your family... hire a body gaurd. Even the strongest anti-gun politicians have those. They are Feinstein-approved!

> If you want good food... hire a chef.

> If you want a safe drive... hire a chauffeur.

> Things are too dangerous for civies... they should just hire professionals to do stuff for them on a daily basis.

What do ya think America?

Update:

No Mr Bricks, I am here for your safety and the safety of America. To create a safe, dependent society. You need us, Me Bricks. AMERICA NEEDS US.

Update 2:

@ieatlunch I too, hate gun nuts. They should all be sent to detainment camps. It's a new legislation we're working on you know. Nothing scares us more than when the peasants have guns.

7 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    7 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    LOL

  • 7 years ago

    This is horrible, stupid, ignorant, and just plain bad judgement. This would leave everyone depressed and stagnant. The policies are also harsh, and demanding. There are also a large amount of consequences, and contradictions in your policies. And there are numerous places that ban deadly weapons, and people have them anyway. These are usually the places with high crime rates. Banning stuff doesn't help. The list of cons goes on, and on, but since you'll never be able to put these into actual laws and policies, I won't bother pointing out every single flaw.

  • Anonymous
    7 years ago

    We can all appreciate the spirit your facetious post Mr pro-gun person, but actually some of your points about energy conservation and social discipline are commendable. If more American people were willing to compromise on petrol guzzling cars and five bedroom mc mansions then maybe your country would not have gone to the dogs in the way it has.

  • ?
    Lv 6
    7 years ago

    You forgot to ban doctors. They are the third leading cause of death in the USA.

    We should at least put a waiting period on them and lock them in a safe when we are not using them.

    250,000 per year; when will the madness stop? What about the children?

    http://www.naturodoc.com/library/public_health/doc...

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  • Anonymous
    7 years ago

    You are from the lie lobby.

  • 7 years ago

    you god damned f@cking gun nuts are getting old fast. can you please just shut the f@ck up about your love of guns for 5 f@cking seconds?

  • Amanda
    Lv 7
    7 years ago

    You are a fool. And probably an Obama supporter.

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