My 14 year olds strange addiction. What can I do now?
I have two kids. A fifteen year old son and a 14 year old daughter.
Ever since my daughter was one she has been addicted to rubbing receipts on body (especially her face and hands). I am not sure as to why she is addicted to receipts exactly, but I know that when she is really stressed, upset, happy, cranky, tired, anything she has to rub herself. She doesn't care if we are in public or who sees her. She has to do it.
She loves Walmart, Target, and Albertsons receipts the best and Home Depot and Lowes are close seconds. It's not even that we give her any. She will ask people for theirs (relatives and even a few strangers who were going to throw them away). She has even gone dumpster diving for them once. Lt year she announced that when she gets married, she wants them all sewn into the linning of her wedding dress so she can have them with her on her wedding day (and she is completely serious about that)
She also has to have all 459 (that is the last she counted them.) with her at all times or she gets really bad anxiety. She will keep them in her purse, pockets, socks and shoes, inside of her bra, anywhere she can keep them. Also she loves to sleep with them. She will dump them all onto her bed and lay in them or have them cover her or what ever it is that she wants that particular night.
My husband, my son, and I have all been trying to get her off of them. We have tried counseling a few times, but she won't talk to the therapist. We have tried stealing them from her and burning them (that only made her have such a bad anxiety attack that she passed out). We have tried taking them from her while she is awake (she gets very protective of her receipts. I had my husband try it a few times and...lets just say it didn't go we'll at all.). We have tried talking to her about it and how it will affect her health. We have begged, pleaded, bribed. We have tried convincing her to pick up a hobby such as sports or art (she loves to play soccer and loves to draw), but she won't do it if she has to give up her receipts. We have tried insulting her pride by it. Nothing is working.
Her health is getting really bad. She has horrible acne and she doesn't want to go out with friends very much any more. I am also worried about all of the germs that are on those receipts.
What can I do? I need her to stop. I just don't understand why she has this addiction. I know people say it could be because she wasn't given enough love as a child, but we have been very open. We are a very close family and we love to spend time with each other. Please help me.
And you know what the really sad part is, is that my daughter doesn't think she has a problem. She thinks this is very healthy and that we are all being very paranoid.
- 7 years agoFavorite Answer
Most of the recipts are not very germy. The dumpster ones, yeah.
YOu really need to take her to a therapist. No one on yahoo can help you solve this. She needs a mental health professional.
- LeanneLv 77 years ago
I think you need to arrange for your doctor to refer her to a psychiatrist. Maybe you could coax her to co-operate by suggesting that as a family, you all need to understand why she has a need for this habit so she sees it as explaining this comfort rather than being forced to give it up. It sounds like a case of transference, at some point when she was very young she may have felt very panicked or traumatized by something, and maybe picked up a random receipt and did some repetitive movements that distracted her, from that point onward she has come to associate the habit with gaining calm and peace from anxiety and cannot cope without the habit because that would then bring up the original trauma? Ansd the trauma could have been anyt disturbing thought that can pass through a young child's mind, not necessarily an outward event.
The other option could be to get her to a hypnotherapist who might be able to de-sensitize her under hypnosis and give her the courage to believe that she doesn't need her habit.
Beyond that, I think as it is an addiction, step back from 'enabling' her in any way. Let her suffer the consequences, whatever form they may come in, from the habit. Do nothing to sort out any chaos, problem, or situation that may come from the habit - remain calm and non-judgement, but leave her to deal with the any repercussions alone. That way, she may be brought sooner to a realization that the habit is destructive and actively want to do something about it.
- Anonymous7 years ago
I am not sure if it would help at all or if you have maybe tried....but you never know. I assume you have talked to people about this trying to figure out what to do. If not, I would recommend a psychologist, doctor, or someone professional.
The only thing I could think for you to try is to teach her what to do with receipts. You are going to want to make this seem fun and exciting. I would purchase some sort of awesome organizer that she will like. You can even have your son 'play along.' Explain that you have to teach both of them how to take care of their receipts and what to do with them so that they can use them if they ever need to refer back to them. Explain that they do not want to throw them away or do anything to destroy them or make the ink fade. If you think she will catch on that you are singling the problem that she is having out, do a couple different things such as teaching them how to write a check, showing them how to balance a checkbook, and showing them how to keep and organize receipts in a file of their own.
Then, if you have the money to do this every few weeks, give both of your children money to purchase something. (within your budget of course) Let them buy it themselves and take the receipts themselves. Then, make sure they have their files near them (in the vehicle or something) so that they can put them in the file.
Make sure that they know that they only get to purchase something if they put the receipt in the organizer. Of course, you are going to want to make sure that you are doing the same thing. Keep your receipts in your own organizer too. Help her to see that they are your receipts that you have to keep.
This could actually be a great learning opportunity for them.
I don't know if this could help, I just thought of it while reading this.
- Anonymous7 years ago
i think you are feeding into the problem by drawing so much attention to it. do not throw away her receipts. do not belittle her or make her feel judged for having them. that is the reason she will not talk to the therapist. you have made her feel ashamed of what she can not help. it sounds like she has a little bit of anxiety/depression/ocd. this is not your daughters choice and no ones fault. also, it is not your! problem. it disturbed me to hear you say that U need HER to stop. for some reason she needs to do this to feel safe, comfortable and loved. by making her feel ashamed and guilty by doing this is only going to make her addiction worse.
i would schedule an appt with a psychologist but do not make her feel as f it is because there is something wrong with her. explain to her that you think everyone in the family could benefit from taking to an outside perspective. she may need some cognitive therapy and/or medication. i would also suggest you and your husband seeing the same psychologist to talk to them about how you are feeling, and how to cope with your daughters illness.
good luck to you and your daughter! i wish you the best!Source(s): work related experience with mental illness
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- 4 years ago
What the hell is incorrect with you? To start with the place the hell does the daddy are available to all of this? PUNISHING HER will relatively embarrass her. Look, you particularly didn't experience being a teenager didn't you? If she masturbates, let her do it? So long as shes no longer sending portraits or interacting with men and women she dosent understand online. Taking her desktop away will quite break her. Why the hell should you punish her for masturbating? Certain she watches porn however is it that bad? Its being a teenager. Porn isnt severe except you're the one making it. Telling you're husband will quite embarrass her. Shes a lady. She dosent want her dad strolling within the room and talking to her about MASTURBATION. Thank you T^T.
- JAMES KLv 77 years ago
Don't steal or burn them. DO speak to a Psychologist. She is obviously using these things as a security and you need to learn what they mean to her, what safety or security they offer her, in order to deal with it
- 7 years ago
Wow. Go talk to your doctor this could be serious
- 7 years ago
i think your daughter need a good psychiatric........sorry for hearing that.....it's really a big problem,...
the doctor will find what exactly she has ?
THIS IS NOT A NORMAL BEHAVIOR /////////////////// TREATMENT IS NEEDED /////////// DON'T WASTE TIME //////////// MORE IMPORTANT IS YOUR DAUGHTER FUTURE.......SO HURRY
I WILL PRAY FOR HERSource(s): ((((((((((((""GOOD PSYCHIATRIC NEEDED "")))))))))))))))))))