How to get a girl to leave her boyfriend for me?

Hey,

There is a girl I really like (I would italicize really if I knew how/could) who has had a bad past and is currently in a toxic relationship. I want to have her in my life, to date her, but she loves her boyfriend, she talks about it frequently with me, which bothers me, but I give her the best advice I have. This is because I have known her boyfriend since before I knew her and have been very close friends with him. But he's changed a lot recently, just become a tool, completely caught up in self-pity and an idea of his selfhood that is dependent on him being an alcoholic loser and jerk.

I treat her as a friend, pursue other girls and talk about them with her, but she's got my heart. I don't know what to do.

Before anyone criticizes me, her mother passed away last year in circumstances I won't discuss in respect to her and she's very insecure and in need of a foundation in her life. Despite it being horrible. her current relationship is there for her and she clings to it. Her boyfriend frequently ignores her, insults her making her feel like this toxic relationship is her fault, and, two times I know of, has even physically abused her.

Is it honorable to want to take a girlfriend from your buddy? No. But does any girl deserve to date a physically and emotionally abusive jerk who takes the frustrations of his own failures out on her. The saddest part is we're still in college and she (a junior) feels she's old and that she deserves this situation. I care about her and am attracted to her and want to get her out of this for both her sake, and I will not understate this (she's very cute and I'm attracted the particular kind of neurosis [which I have described] she demonstrates), and mine.

What can I do?

Update:

i doubt it's just sympathy, I feel like I've connected with her a couple times. she's too shy to expres herself most of the time, which is a shame because she's a really insightful, clever chick.

1 Answer

Relevance
  • Anonymous
    8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    i think u dont love her!!! i think u have a sympathy to her. What ever u did , is as a friend. it cant have another color . if u proceed to be propose her, u may lose her and ur buddy. beng a such a bold guy to quote ur exact feelings , i think u can be a best partner to anybody.This is not ur cup of tea!!

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