My life is falling apart and i want to kill myself? Need help?
I've been through so much, i dont even know where to begin. For the past 4 years, i've been suffering from severe depression. My mom suffers from severe depression and bi polar disorder, which she takes zoloft for and my dad has dissociative personality disorder and is bi polar but he doesnt take anything, plus he smokes cigarettes alot. He's nice to me for like five seconds and then hates me and my mom is the same way he is, she's nice and then gets mad at me over nothing. I'm 22 years old. I've been through so much in my life that i literally just want to kill myself. I smoke cigerettes too, i was basically pushed to do it by the people that i work with and my parents that i regret ever doing to this day. i socially smoke but it helps relive my depression. I was precribed zoloft last may which helped at first but as time went on, i srated not aring anymore about my life, i felt careless and if i stop the zoloft now i'll be done for. I'm failing in college now, doing terrible in my statistics class, i feel weaker everyday and i cough alot non stop and the left side my chest hurts so i feel like i'm dying everyday. My parents never seem to care about my health or anything, they think im some stupid nut job with no life. My brother who wish cared for me doesn't, he think's that im some loser who doesnt do anything besides complain about my life and that i don't go out. I feel shaky most days which is very wierd. My parents don't want to take to the doctor because they think im perfectly healthy when i'm really not. I've been so confused and dizzy laetly too like, im for forgetting things and unable to focus anymore on anything. I've tried so many things help me with the way i am like herbal teas but they dont help. I excercise too but that doesnt seem to help. I have no friends or nothing. Im 22 and im going no where with my life. I never had a girlfriend before or a relationship. My parents and the rest of my family dont talk to me or even wanna hangout or see how im doing in school or anything. I smoke too much everyday, grieving over my life and the way i am. My job isnt good either since they made me like this. I work at a resturant as a busboy and they want me to quit or fire me, they say it to my face all the time. My major is sociology and people think its a joke of a major and a real stupid one which its not. I want to work in social services and help people like me but nobody seems to appreciate that.I just dont care about my life at this point and would rather be dead. I look terrible too. I can't get off of zoloft and i dont even know if its been helping me. What do i do i need adivce from anyone out there. Please!
- Anonymous8 years ago
This is amusing!!!
- Anonymous8 years ago
Hey, not sure if you seen that I edited my answer on your other one of these. But, I added a contact number, mine. If you need to text or talk. Please do so.
- 8 years ago
Nicotine is a suppressant and addictive, but it in no means makes you feel any better. IT'S time to stop.
Whenever I'm down take a walk and don't think about anything. Thinking stimulates emotions so the best way is to do something active. What you want is the build up of endorphins because this excites your whole cells in your body and helps you feel better. Stay active like doing sports, dancing anything that gets the blood pumping good once in awhile.
No caffeine because it looks like it affects your mood. When you do need to talk about how you feel, talk to a close friend, but always try to turn negative thoughts to positives if you can otherwise you WILL be thinking about it for awhile.
Just in case here are some references that can help with understanding chemicals that are consumed.