My boyfriend says it's "too hard" to make me ***...?
i have a sex problem.... I'm a 25 yearold girl... I have been going out with my boyfriend for 7 months now. And the sex is good but i cannot orgasm. (When I masturbate I orgasm all the time--so there's nothing wrong with me i think)
In my past, i had a boyfriend of 3 years that I NEVER climaxed with during sex..I was around 20 years old and I guess it wasn't so important for me back then, and I never made it a big deal.
.. However I also dated one guy a year ago that changed my sex life... I dated him for 4 months or so, and unfortunately I didn't love him and he wasn't the one, however he was completely in love with me. and Each time we had sex he made SURE i came and he would not *** until I did. And I think that was the most amazing sex for me... I think (maybe i'm wrong) it made me realize most men don't really know that they have to care about the girl more than themselves in sex.... Maybe i'm wrong but I think it was a combination of him just being so in love with me and caring more about me than himself, and knowing what he was doing.
Now with my current boyfriend, I'm very happy... Everything is amazing.. but this orgasm thing is starting to be important to me. I want to have it MOST of the time too, if he's having it, it's not fair! In the begginning I didn't ever complain or make it a big deal and let him know sex was good. Now I've starting to tell him that I do not *** after sex, and he has started feeling like ****... Once he felt like **** he felt very challenged, and because he loves a challenge one day he tried and it took us 1 hour and I came and It was AMAZING... .The problem is after that we had sex 4-5 more times and he just came after 15 minutes, didn't wait for me, didn't do anything he did when it finally "worked" It makes me feel like he doesn't care enough to please me-- I opened the subject with him:
And he said: "i've never had any girl before that's as hard to *** as you, all the girls i had sex with before LOVED my performance, and and to make you orgasm is SOOOO HARd to do." I asked if he didn't enjoy it the time he made me climax, and he said not as much as you....because He said, "I feel like I'm not enjoying it so much because it becomes stressful and I have to strategize and hold myself and kind of think like i'm on a mission to give you an orgasm.. AND It takes you WAY too long it's never like that with any other girl i've been with"
What do I do... I am very confused. I feel so bad because he doesn't care about what's so important to me. Am I wrong about this sex thing ? should I be working on myself and learning how to *** faster? or should he be "working" to please me? HELP
- 8 years ago
Tell you boyfriend he has to put in more time with foreplay and using his hands and mouth.And here is a trick i like to do to women. Just tell your boyfriend to put two of his fingers inside you, curl them up and begin pumping.
Also you and your boyfriend should just by the karma sutra.