is this a persuasive presentation ?

i wrote a speech because the doctor asked me to do so but when i send it over to her she gave me some unrelated answers to my question but in the end she told me no this isn't a persuasive speech because u wrote it down in an informative way so your whole speech is wrong so i re-wrote my speech and send it over to her but my stupid doctor told me that she won't read my speech but she may read my matrix. "lazy doctor". so i want someone to check what i wrote and give me his opinion

Why a mac

Have your computer ever lag and you was forced to shut it down and reboot your system or while you are browsing and opining a lot of tabs suddenly your browser stops for a moment and restarted, I don’t know about you but for me oh yeah it happened several times or every time I start using my computer. I tried updating my system, checking for viruses, upgrading from windows vista to windows 7 and upgrading my ram at the begging it worked but then everything was the same and this was driving me nuts, this is when I decided to buy a new laptop and my chose the mac. Apple is one of the leading companies in the computer industry because of their operating system, design and weight.

at the beginning of my speech I was complaining because of my computer lagging and the reason behind this is the operating system because when you try to open an app you just click on it but your app sends an order to your os requesting certain files in order to open, your os will reply with these files and here is the trick if your os is very good these messages will be short and fast and this feature the mac os offer to their customers.

next is the design i took interest in the solid color and the practical look of the mac man who wouldn't take interest on this machine unless you like those colored boxes of alien ware or Acer.

at last is the weight of this thing we all want some light weight laptop that we can carry it with us any where we want, travailing, going for work or having the weekend in the chalet, so you don’t need a heavy laptop that looks like a microwave and i am sure that almost all of you know which brand i am referring to.

in conclusion i think the laptop you chose reflect your needs whether you are some lonely nerd setting in front of your microwave 24 hr or a hard worker who like to do his job the best way he could. but keep in mind that you should consider the os, design and the weight of your laptop.

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  • 7 years ago
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    no... you need to follow an outline like this:

    Preparation Outline

    Title: The Death Penalty

    General Purpose: To persuade

    Specific Purpose: To persuade my audience why we need a moratorium of capital punishment until we mend a broken system.

    Central Idea: That capital punishment, as it is practiced today, is a racist, unfair, unjust, and unconstitutional act that is currently uncivilized and in desperate need of reform.

    Introduction:

    I. The current justice system is flawed.

    II. The application of the death penalty violates our Constitution.

    III. We are executing the wrongfully convicted, thus committing state sanctioned murder.

    IV. The justice system is racist, and executes its poor and mentally handicapped.

    V. Capital cases are often defended by attorneys who are unprepared, overworked, and underfunded.

    VI. Vengeance often plays a part in decision to execute, which only creates more victims and does nothing to heal wounds.

    VII. Capital Punishment is not a deterrent to crime, and if fact might even create more crime.

    VIII. We have options available for more effective forms of punishment but refuse to use them.

    IX. We need to take immediate action to stop this barbaric practice, at least until we mend our terribly broken system.

    Preview Statement: Today I would like to persuade you why the death penalty, as it is practiced in the United States today, is an ineffective, biased, and unlawful practice, how other forms of punishment are available and how and why you should act to halt this barbaric practice immediately until the broken system is mended.

    Body:

    Internal Preview: With the justice system supposedly being set up to be a fair, just, and civilized system, today it has become overworked and underfunded creating the risk of innocent defendants being handed a death sentence, which violates human rights and the Constitution.

    I. Our justice system is terribly broken and in desperate need of repair.

    a. We are allowing the government to take away out basic rights guaranteed under the Constitution.

    i. Capital punishment violates the 1st, 8th, and 14th Amendments.

    ii. The laws change with what society considers as acceptable.

    b. The current system executes the poor, mentally ill, and more importantly our innocent.

    i. The current system is extremely biased and does nothing to protect even the innocent.

    ii. It is an uncivilized barbaric practice that gives the rest of the world a poor opinion of the United States.

    Internal Summary/Transition: There are many causes as to why capital punishment has gone so wrong over the last several years, and I would like to share a few of them with you.

    II. Capital cases often involve indigent defendants and receive some of the worst counsel.

    a. Attorneys are appointed by the State with no consideration to experience or willingness.

    i. The appeals process can take many years due to ineffective representation.

    ii. The taxpayer generally carries the burden of this cost.

    iii. Cases where lawyers are sleeping during trial have been documented.

    b. The media portrays inmates on death row as monsters so we dehumanize them and seek revenge against them instead of working to promote healing and deter crime.

    i. We are lead, falsely, to believe condemned inmates are intrinsically evil.

    ii. This creates feelings of anger and hate that lead us to call for revenge.

    c. Violence begets violence and by allowing State sanctioned violence we are making a statement of approval.

    i. Killing will never show killing is wrong.

    ii. Violence allowed in any format by society will only create more violence and higher crime rates.

    Internal Summary/Transition: When the many flaws in the justice system are examined it’s not hard to understand their cause and with action we can help prevent this travesty from continuing.

    III. Alternative forms of punishment are available while we work to mend or broken system and we need to take action immediately for reform.

    a. Life imprisonment is a viable solution that is overlooked

    i. Life sentence shows the value of all human life.

    ii. Life imprisonment is a more cost effective form of punishment.

    b. WE need to take immediate action against a flawed system that murders innocent and violates human rights.

    i. Become an active part of reform for all rights.

    ii. Be a part of something you can be proud of that truly does affect the world we live in.

    Conclusion:

    I. There is an obvious problem with equal justice.

    II. By allow the violation of human rights we are risking our own rights.

    III. We should be outraged at the unjust and unfair way capital punishment is dealt out.

    IV. Acts of violence ever become an answer to ending violence.

    V. We need to become active and aware because under the current system, we could be next on the table

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