I asked out a girl and we were supposed to go out on a date but this happened... Please help i realy like her?
We met at a party and i realy liked her. while everyone was leaving i learned that she was single so i asked her out. She giggled with shyness and said yes immediatley and gave me her number. I had some stuff going on so i asked her if next week was ok and she said yes. 2 days later i had 3 unexpected, small, surgeries and texted her that i may not be able to make it that week. She said it was no problem and wished me well. Then we started texting a little bit and she told me that i was very sweet and stuff. at the end she asked my age and i told her that i just recently turned 18 (she is 15) then she stopped texting untill a couple days later i texted her saying that i would be able to go but because of the surgeries i had this small temporary machine attached to my wound to help it heal faster and at at the end i attached a joke saying this could be her only chance going out with a guy who has a small machine attached to him. She said that her aunts birthday was on that day and that she couldnt go out so i asked her what about the day after and there was no response. Again i waited for a day and asked her if i wrote something wrong and she said no that i just scared her. I immediatly told her that i was sorry and didnt intend to scare her and she told me that it was ok, so i re asked my question and she didnt answer again. I waited for a day and then kinda gave up and sent her these exact words "one last thing im a persistant guy so its hard for me to give up XD so im sorry if i was pushy or if that scared u but u seemed like a very nice girl at the party and i just wanted to take u out to dinner and get to now know u better" and again no response. So can someone tell me where did i go wrong, did i come out too strong and is there a way to fix it?
- 8 years agoFavorite Answer
People are the most dynamic force in the world. They constantly change and adjust to their surroundings.
Have you ever heard of fundamental attribution error? Its a term used when people attribute disposition factors to things and underestimate situational factors. She probably thought you lacked commitment and such because she was being put aside. Though it wasn't your fault because surgery is inedible, she probably still cognitively felt that you are just a busy man and had no time or a guy that makes up a lot of crap because you can't keep a promise. You didn't do anything wrong. It doesn't seem like you came on too strong, except for that text. Women have developed a process to categorize men in two places. Punks who want to get into women's pants and a somewhat promising guy. They tend to do this with extreme prejudice and quicker than a heartbeat. But her patience just wore thin and she probably thought of you as another sleaze ball dude. Happens to everyone.
It's hard to get someone back when they disregard you as trash. You could try to talk to her in person since text has that option of not replying. But besides that, your gonna need some ingenious plan to find the chance to give you a chance. You do that by showing who you are and opening up to her. If that doesn't work, i think you might just have to move on because she seemed to be just a stranger at a party who swayed in your interest. I mean if the chance happens to come along, yeah take it. But you cant force someone to like you very easily. Persistence is stupid sometimes. Its like watering a dead plant sometimes.
- 8 years ago
I believe you came on to strong you have to keep in mind she is 15 it probably scared her that you were 18 or maybe made her uncomfortable? try givinig it a couple of day and try mssging her again but just one message if you text her more than once it makes it reaalllyyy uncomfortable you want her to txt you because she wants to not because she feels bad or anything like that... and if she doesnt txt u back then just wait let time do its job she gave you her number didnt she! :)
- 8 years ago
Well she clearly started acting weird when your stated your age. Honestly, I think she may feel that you're a little too much older or I think she may not want to be seen with someone who is walking around with a machine. Unless you had some kind of time machine or super healer, I don't think you could fix that :/ Sorry buddy.
- bibleLv 44 years ago
hi durathor, on account that she's a minor, it will be that her mum and dad instructed her she doesn't be allowed to date you. diverse mum and dad are uncomfortable about having their 15-three hundred and sixty 5 days previous daughter date an 18-three hundred and sixty 5 days previous guy. And it will be they don't even favor her texting you. mum and dad are like that, ya comprehend. Deb
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- 8 years ago
Talk to her friends or try to get her number off fb and tell her you've been thinking about her
- Anonymous8 years ago
Same boat as you..
Maybe she lost interest in you at some point, ?