short recording of me rapping?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jv6VTdAidQM

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&feature=plcp

recorded from phone you think it sounds good? im deciding if i should continue to make a song

Update:

nice and helpful to see your opinions just to point to out i am 17

ps im turk not british lol?

3 Answers

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  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    If I have to be honest, I don't think it's that good. It's desent, don't get me wrong all you need is a few pointers. Stop only using big words to rhyme with. Trust me, it only sound good in the hands of a knowledge rapper fx:

    "You gon get smashed and pulverized

    So ****** know now you ain't bumpin' to sober guys; I'm over high

    Tell Mayor Bloomberg sign the city over to me

    And when he do it, make sure that it's notarized"

    Pulverized, sober guys ( 2 words rhyming with 1 ), notarized.

    Try mixing it with small and big fx:

    "Everyday ****, around the way **** got me stressed

    So i keep on the vest in case a ***** wanna test

    I got no time for games cause I'm all grown up

    You wanna joke *****? laugh when you get blown up

    See how funny it is when your kids aint got no father

    Cause you played it sweet now you floating in the harbor

    **** is hectic so respect it for your health

    Didn't think it was right, you should've checked it yourself)

    Life is too short to get caught up in some dumb ****

    Wake up one day, 40 years old on some bumb ****

    Time flew by, you was too fly to see the light

    Everyday it's getting darker then comes the night

    Now what? (what) realize that you ain't got ****

    Not long ago you was the man on some hot ****

    So just peep the flow yo, cause you already in this

    Make sure your **** is right kid and handle your business"

    Even rhyme the same words then and again.

    Try rhyming 1 word with multiple fx

    "I don't like racism, but if you do it to me imma do it to you

    give a **** if you beautiful"

    It gives it a little more intelligence

    Try rhyming words with non-rhyming words, if you don't know what I mean look at this:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ffxUT7Puf0

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    This dude rhymed - devilish with terrorist - bond with Qu'ran with Saddam with Iran - Saga with Nicaragua - Prison with patriotism - Ghetto with Settle

    This is hard considering you can't find this stuff on a rhymebook..

    I think you should make another song, but try using these pointers and see what happends.

    Last but NOT LEAST be real. Don't fall into the fake stuff.

    Source(s): Lyrics from: Style P - It's over Nas ft Dmx - Life is what you make it Vinnie Paz ft Demoz - Bodysnatchers Immortal Technique - 4th Branch Stephen: " Rap will never be a smart mans music " Bro listen to Tupac, Dmx, Lupe Fiasco, Big L Immortal Technique, Vinnie Paz, K-Rino, Big Pun, Eminem, Notorious BIG, Nas, Hopsin, Prodigy and so on lol.
  • 8 years ago

    I'm going to give you my honest opinion because I think it can be good. Right now, it doesn't really sound good to me at all. The reason I don't like it is that your flow doesn't connect with the beat. The beat itself needs more thump, first off. But more importantly, I think it would sound way better if you rapped with a rhythm that matched with the beat. Rap like each rhyme is a musical note, and you're making music along this beat in the background.

    As a rapper, if you feel you have stuff to say, ya know, important messages to tell us, don't forget that it still has to be musical. I think the majority of failed rappers go out there thinking they can just scribble down a bunch of big rhymes, and that's it. No! It's music, first and foremost. So improve the musicality of it, and then I think it will be very solid. I think your voice would actually be great if you did that!

    Source(s): Look up anything by Nas, or Tha Carter II, or anything by Biggie Smalls. They all did the type of thing I'm talking about
  • 8 years ago

    I'm american. I like rap. Like you I often rap and find it fun but you seem too smart for rap and that shows in your words. Rap will never be a smart mans music at the rate it is going now, although we can enjoy it.

    Ps. Take this as a compliment Also it was interesting to hear with an accent but that accent in my opinion is the totally opposite of what rap stands for. It is too polished and rap is about being the total opposite of polished.

    I didn't say you were british but you obviously learned british english. And your accent doesn't suit rap imo.

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