I like a Muslim girl! need positive advice please!?

okay, so I met this muslim girl at a gym and I'm a christian, I wasn't really into her until once I saw her with her friends giggling and smiling. They were nervous flirtatious laughs, and well i was curios so i looked and our glances crossed,after that i noticed she would go to the gym during the times i would go which would be mondays through thursdays, she always looked my way and approached me but never talked so i read about her culture.It seems like some things aren't acceptable but i know her glance wasn't a very modest one and it was one of attraction and well I just ignored the issue since i wasn't interested, but after a while i don't know why or when i started liking her, now im deeply infatuated, i can't sleep sometimes thinking about her. Now that I'm showing that girl more interest through glances now she seems to want to avoid me a bit but still looks at me. Why is she avoiding me if she was the one who started it? Her female friends are constantly with her and it feels like she has her friends feel out the situation for her and also I've seen her talk to other muslim guys and non muslims and well if they can then it means i can talk to her too right? And she goes to my university too.I know i have to do something otherwise I will miss my chance, I know she likes me I swear I do,I just dont know how to get close and I need advice, i dont need someone to tell me that it is haram, if i cared I would follow that advice but as you can see i don't care if it is haram. SO please keep your negativity to yourself because i dont believe in quiting. I dont care what the price is but I need to approach her and advice on HOW TO APPROACH HER would be appreciated and also opinions but no negativity i hope you guys can help me out. thanks


@fairytale & talat: this is not helpful at all...smh

Update 2:

I can educate myself in Islam, but I don't think I can betray my religion, can compromise though. I am man enough to propose for marriage, how hard can it be right? just talk to her dad and pretty much its done so it should be a piece of cake

Update 3:

@enlightened: I can educate myself in Islam, but I don't think I can betray my religion, can compromise though. I am man enough to propose for marriage, how hard can it be right? just talk to her dad and pretty much its done so it should be a piece of cake

Update 4:

@my master of idk what: no, I'm afraid you mistaked me for another poor soul, thanks for trying to help out though

Update 5:

@ my maste of...etc: its allright, im sure mistakes happen every once in a while

Update 6:

@jiji: it isn't pointless, I mean its her parents where it may be pointless, in any case I'm not trying to get her parents to like me or anything because I like her not "baba". The stare, well i never made eye contact with her at first, I just knew she would look at me through my peripheral vision so i'm not mistaken, Im sure. I know I sound a bit stubborn but believe me, I already used logic on some stuff like that and eliminated those options due to uncompatibility with the issue at hand.

Update 7:

neha: I live in the U.S. I don't think that primitive act would be done, Im betting her parents are civilized. Thatnks for the heads up though

Update 8:

@enlightened: wow, well thats really a bad situation for me :/ I just dont get it why can't a person just decide who they like and live and let live but I suppose its gonna be a rough journey, I guess the adventure might be worth the destination, so im willing to still try. One more heartbreak shouldn't be too bad

Update 9:

@enlightened: I know my parents would love her :) so she would definitely be welcome if sh chooses to, hope something good happens

Update 10:

@walker: i have no idea bro

Update 11:

@clarity: I see your point, but jesus said to love everyone, he didn't stutter, I'm not muslim and I think that is too harsh no? anyways, I am not concerned by that issue, i just care about the one where I needed advice, thanks for your contributions

Update 12:

@이반 : I've come to think of that :/ but I just don't want it to be the case, no worse blind guy than one tha doesn't want to see right? anyways, thanks for the fedback

Update 13:

@cuppa: kindly SMD :)

Update 14:

@ S: First of all I'm not sparky, Im eric, fuckn dumb ***. :D I am not studying her religion, I knew some stuff about it because unlike others I got an education and can ******* READ! :D I did say I didn't need ******* negativity too, maybe I can handout some reading lessons next time. Perhaps I do have a ******* lonely life but what's it to you? I didn't ask for it to be evaluated? :D

People are astonishing nowadays...smh

Update 15:

@screaming spirit: I appreciate your advice. I'm a pretty strong guy so I think her brothers would have to be something else to actually intimidate me, and I even got brothers myself so I don't really feel threathened at this point.

8 Answers

  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I'm a muslim girl myself, so I probably know what's going through her head. I think she does have a little crush on you, but is scared and embarrassed to do anything about it. If she had a good grasp of her religion, she wouldn't be giving you looks, but she is - so religious-wise, she must have average faith. Lemme ask you a question - Does she wear a scarf around her head?

    But I strongly agree with other users' answers - she's probably just messing with you. She started off trying to get your attention in her own ways, saw that you're paying her the attention, got what she wanted but also got nervous or the game started to get tedious so she started to avoid you. Sounds plausible to me.

    The reason for asking whether she wears a scarf is - if she doesn't and bearing in mind she's in Uni and is waaay past the age of puberty, I wouldn't say she's religious or cares much about Islam. (since the first thing a girl does when she hits puberty is put on a headscarf)

    If she does wear one, well then someone needs to educate her about throwing glances at guys. She's still probably liberal, cos the reason for putting on a headscarf is lost on her.

    Wise words bro - Just forget her. It'll be hard but like you said, this is just an infatuation, a crush if you want - You hardly know her personality. Is she a total *****? Does she have a way of speaking that just grates on you? Is she careless about the things you hold dear? Things like that would determine whether you like a girl's personality and to leap steps further - whether she's fit for marriage.

    What's she's playing is a game - don't join in. It's not about not quitting and winning - Just focus on what you went to Uni for.

    Maybe the 'forbidden' theme is exciting you about the situation. Giving you AND her a thrill.

    I hope, not for her sake, but for yourself that you learn more about the Islamic religion. Who knows, maybe this step could be life-changing. It won't hurt you to try.


    (P.s.: If you want more advice, don't hesitate in emailing me)

  • Angie
    Lv 4
    8 years ago

    a muslim woman can't get married to a non-muslim man

    so its pointless from the start if her family is strict and care about religion then they won't agree

    the only way you can do it is to convert and from what i see you can't

    so its pointless give up

    you can educate yourself in islam and know the truth of islam and it is very easy (learn it from its people not from its enemies ) but even if you know a lot about islam you can't marry her till you convert or she converts (its weird ,she is supposed to know that it is pointless why would she flirt? )

    also another thing which happens a lot

    when a girl accidentally cross glances with a man and so as he ,both will think that the other is flirting where they aren't , maybe you thought this and also is she , so she became somehow interested and started to want to be sure if you are really looking and so as you so both of you may have thought that the other is interested when it is only an accident from the first place :/

    talking to other guys in important matters with groups is not that harram but on necessity only and some muslim girls can't do somethings in islam just arrogance and stubbornness they make it sound difficult when it is easier than what they do , some girls say there is no harm to talk with guy in groups , some sheikhs says it is ok and some strict sheikhs say it isn't so the girl chooses , maybe she talks with guy due to that excuse but you have to avoid one thing (being alone with her because all muslims says it is harram with a confirmed hadeeth , if you respect her ,respect her religion )

    peace be upon us and on you

  • Ethel
    Lv 4
    5 years ago

    I personally knew a guy, in fact a Brahmin, who liked a Muslim girl. When he approached the girl and proposed to her, she told him that, she can only marry a Muslim man. So he began studying Islam. Fortunately for this guy, since he was a Brahmin himself, knew well about the principle teachings of the Vedas and Puranas, which is strictly monotheistic as the following, contrary to the practice of the Hindus: 1) “Ekam evadvitiyam” [Chandogya Upanishad 6:2:1] “He is One and Only, without a second “. 2) “Na casya kascij janita na cadhipah” [Svetasvatara Upanishad 6:9] “Of Him there are neither parent’s nor Lord”. 3) “Na tasya pratima asti” [Svetasvatara Upanishad 4:19] “There is no likeness of Him”. 4) “Na samdrse tisthati rupam asya, na caksusa pasyati kas canai nam”[Svetastara Upanishad 4 :20] “His form is not to be seen, no one sees Him with the Eye “. 5) “Na tasya pratima asti” [Yajurveda 32 : 3] “There is no image of Him”. 6) “Shudhama paapvidham”[Yajurveda 40:8]. “He is bodiless and pure”. 7) “Andhatama pravishanti ye asambhuti mupaste” [Yajurveda 40:9] “They enter in darkness, those who worship the natural element’s (air, water etc.) “They sink deeper in darkness, those who worship sambhuti”(created things). The Brahmasutra of Hinduism is: “Ekam Brahm, dvitya naste neh na naste Kinchan” “There is only One God, not the second ; not at all, not at all, not in the least bit”. So, he converted to Islam and married the girl. But when a friend of his asked him as to what he would have done if the girl had rejected him, as to whether he would remain a muslim or revert back to hinduism, he readily replied: 'I have found the truth now. Even if the girl had turn me down, I wouldn't have given up Islam'.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Well... Maybe it's just a crush. It'll go away in no time. Even If you approach and get to know her, do you think you can date? I don't think so. Just try to stay away from her man. I wouldn't want you to hurt her nor her you.

    Source(s): Btw.. Ask if she has any brothers.. If she does, you're dead. -.-
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  • 8 years ago

    That girl is a tease, bro

    Or just playing around

  • 8 years ago

    Embrace and educate yourself in islam

    Propose for marriage!

    That is if you're man enough!

    It's not that easy because if you are not a muslim, then i don't even think they will welcome you in their home!

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Ask her if she would like to go see a movie sometime.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Concentrate on your studies!

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