My worst nightmare is being a 'momish' woman?
I have coworkers who are married and all they talk about is how 'amazing' their snot nosed toddlers are. And they all walk around with cheerios and juice boxes and babywipes. And they all look the same. Same haircut, wearing gross unflattering capri pants, keds. And theyre all obsessed with losing weight and eating salad and new trendy fashion or diet fads. Its like an endless cycle of talking about clothes, shoes, sales, coupons, kids, husband.
It's all so boring and unappealing.
I'm serious. With the exception of being literally tortured, my worst nightmare is having these people as friends for the rest of my life.
Where are all the cooler people?
You NAILED it with the yoga look.
They're like "My hubby Donald needs me to stay in shape, or he's gonna run off with his floozy secretary Riley. Ever since I hit 30, my metabolism just isn't what it used to be and I need to let everybody know it. But resistance training will make me look masculine so I have to do either Yoga or dance aerobics with a group of other women because I lack the will power to fly solo. And I can't change out of my clothes because then people won't see that I've exercised today. And I have to pick up Conor and Justin at school and then bring them to their football and soccer games. Thank goodness I chose gender appropriate activities without even asking them if they were interested or not. They're just mommy's little all-stars. If only I had a girl then I could have her take dance. Oh, better get home and cook my quinoa brown rice green tea spelt sea weed tufo dinner ! dr oz says so, and I believe every word.'